Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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Two gay guys hosted a barbecue. The music and food was great. Everyone had a good time.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What does a homeless man eat for Thanksgiving? Half of a big mac he found in the dumpster

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

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what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

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ObamaCare

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What do you call a gay Jew? I don't know, but Jews are cool.

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I dont no the difference between their and there

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So a Jewish Family walks into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

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If Earth is a triangle, then why are trees smart? Because turtles have 4 legs

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Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

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Why is the black guy unable to support his family? He's 3 years old.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He still lives there.

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What would be a good feature for this site? A search by keyword feature. (sorry...)

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You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

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did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? he's all right now

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Why the long face?" The bartender backhands the man making him fall off of his stool.

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Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

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Your mom is so stupid she went back to collage and got her masters n buissnes.

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what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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