Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: what happens when you eat all the potatoes A: there all gone

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why didn't the blond resolved the Cold War? Once the blond's socio-economic background was really poor, she didn't have enough education to solve such geopolitical conflict, envolving imperialism, international influence, militar power and scientifical power, still without armed conflicts, as the respective leaders of both United States of America and United Soviet Socialist Republics knew a armed conflict would cost too much lifes, and even in a totally utilitarian society, the benefits of the war to both countries wouldn't be enough to justify the death of thousands. Therefore, its concluded that a meedle class person wouldn't be enough capable to be the charged to solve this kind of tenssion between States, and it would be really silly if someone happened to encharge the blond in issue.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

pizzano is a tool.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

126

thumb_up thumb_down -47

How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

thumb_up thumb_down +90

Q: Why did the man take a shower? A: because he was dirty.

thumb_up thumb_down +86

What has five letters and sounds like "trucks?" Vroom

thumb_up thumb_down +52

I dropped two snare drums and a cymbal down a hole earlier. They're probably broken now.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A guy walks into a pub. He cant walk out because hes blind.

thumb_up thumb_down

Good for him. Thats wonderful!

thumb_up thumb_down -78

A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

thumb_up thumb_down -112

On a scale of Voldemort to Nigel Thornberry, how large is your nose?

thumb_up thumb_down +99

The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: What's worse than death? A: Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the girl say to her tits? I wanna suck u.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Two gay guys hosted a barbecue. The music and food was great. Everyone had a good time.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did Brielle say when she fell off the swing? Ow.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops