What did the muffin say to the other? This isn't logical

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Why was the sea green? because a whale took a piss

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Oh, they were just nailing a notice of foreclosure to the door.

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Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

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A guy walks into a pub. He cant walk out because hes blind.

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? -taken care of. by: Calee^_^•

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And so the poster says to the apple ........ Your not my dog

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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Q: a blonde, a brunette, and redhead jump off a cliff, which one hits the ground first? A: Most likely the one that weighs more

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ObamaCare

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People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

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What do you call a gay Jew? I don't know, but Jews are cool.

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A plane is flying low over New York City. It's low on fuel and needs to land.

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Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

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What would be a good feature for this site? A search by keyword feature. (sorry...)

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Two gay guys hosted a barbecue. The music and food was great. Everyone had a good time.

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who broke the little boys window? his abductor/rapist.

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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What does a homeless man eat for Thanksgiving? Half of a big mac he found in the dumpster

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What did the black guy said when he ate a pie? Nothing, he learned not to speak with a full mouth.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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what's worse than getting a bad test grade? being raped.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Probably cheese, since there really isn't a possesive form of the noun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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