How do you starve a black man? You don't feed him.

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whats round red and taste like candy? such a thing doesn't exist

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A man walks into the bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The man replies, "Oh, sorry." And proceeds to remove his horse mask.

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What does a homeless man eat for Thanksgiving? Half of a big mac he found in the dumpster

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why did the baby cry? Someone threw a brick at his head.

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matt shut up

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Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

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Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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Milk MILK MILK MILK M-I-L-K M-I-L-K M-I-L-K M_I_L_K M_I_L_K M_I_L_K What do cows drink? Water, and if you thought it was milk, your probably retarded.

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Why did the red head never have a boyfriend? She was a lesbian and had always preferred women over men

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

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What is the priest favorite book? The Bible

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why did the young man visit the optometrist? Because when he went to put in his contacts earlier that morning, he dropped one on the carpet and couldn't find it and it was his last pair so he needed to go order new ones but it had been over a year since he had been to the optometrist so they make you come get your eyes checked before you make a new order to decide whether the lens strength should remain the same or be increased/decreased.

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What's funny about an anti-joke? It's a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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What did the girl say to her tits? I wanna suck u.

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how do you kill a Jewish person? you don't that just fucking mean!

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What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

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If I said "This AntiJoke will get thumbs up" It will get thumbs up

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

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I dropped two snare drums and a cymbal down a hole earlier. They're probably broken now.

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What's red and on fire? My crotch

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A guy walks into a pub. He cant walk out because hes blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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