a mom tell her kid not to play with knives ten years later tells her kid not to play with knives and the kid asks y and the mom says because ur older brother killed his father and himself playing with knives so the kid said mom i promise i wont do that then kils his mom and himself

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ok so what is big yellow and can not swim well dont look for the answer deuce bag

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Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

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What is the best type of pepper? Well, some people say that the yellow pepper is the sweetest and most delicious, although others prefer red, green or orange peppers.

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Your computer runs so slow that I had to run a virus scan.

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Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

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82

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N

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What the best part of having sex with twenty-eight year olds? Theres 20 of them.

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What is white and when it falls, your fridge is broken? Your fridge.

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how do you make a baby cry? throw bricks at his face.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

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whats bright and yellow? the sun.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

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Whats 9+10? Well it's certainly not 21

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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Why did the young man visit the optometrist? Because when he went to put in his contacts earlier that morning, he dropped one on the carpet and couldn't find it and it was his last pair so he needed to go order new ones but it had been over a year since he had been to the optometrist so they make you come get your eyes checked before you make a new order to decide whether the lens strength should remain the same or be increased/decreased.

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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What's red and on fire? My crotch

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Jesus may have walked on water, but Stephen Hawking runs on batteries.

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What do you call a black guy with a gun? A soldier.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Good guess!

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A blond was driving her car one day when "Party in the USA" came one the radio. She put her hands up; however, she realized she had to keep control of the car. She put one hand back on the steering wheel and arrived to her destination safely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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