what kind of animals marriage is high? snails because It has home and car.

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

Nero, its not that, people are leaving left and right, you where right when you told me that I was holding into the remains of a rotting corpse, the underground society is dead and money alone will never bring it back, but I got the funds and you the talent, is there nothing that can be achieved? You are a lawyer, you write novels, you live a family life, you work for who the hell knows what organization, is this what you traded your, or if I may say, our legacy for? I dont suspect you Nero, I am disappointed in you, part of me wishes you where a backstabber, rather than the one that just quit.

Three Jews walk into a bar... I lied, it was a gas chamber.

Q.why did the car crash? A.becaus eit was drivin by a sack of potatos.

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 5 comfortably

Your computer runs so slow that I had to run a virus scan.

Why was the sea green? because a whale took a piss

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

A joke were created last night and was so funny! But this is not the case

knock knock your nana had a cardiac arrest and thankfull dead now

ok so what is big yellow and can not swim well dont look for the answer deuce bag

If Earth is a triangle, then why are trees smart? Because turtles have 4 legs

A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

How do you starve a black man? You don't feed him.

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin boys? Thomas and David after his father and grandfather.

What the best part of having sex with twenty-eight year olds? Theres 20 of them.

what is light brown and looks like sand? sand

What is sad about four lawyers in a car driving of a cliff? The car fit six people.

A blond, a brunette and a redhead jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground last? Depends on their weight and drag co-efficient.

Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

roses are grey violets are grey i am color blind

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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