Today I looked at a clock and realized that I was late.

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Two computers walk into a bar I forget the rest

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What's black and buried in my backyard? An African American, I'm a member of the Ku Klux Klan

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding it in your nose.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 5 comfortably

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?

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Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

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Q: What do you call a fly with no wings. A: Dying.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

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how do you double your cash? You rip it in half.

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What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

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Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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roses are red, voilets are creepy, i can beat you in call of duty

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How do you treat a homeless man? Like any other person, you disgusting fuck.

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A man walks into a bar and utters profanity because he's hit his head on a protruding metal object that cannot move out of the way and has therefore made him look stupid because he neglected to walk around it.

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Who's this Jesus, have you heard of him?

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What's funny about an anti-joke? It's a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Why was the sea green? because a whale took a piss

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What person looks most like Jim Carry? Jim Carry

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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What did the girl say to her tits? I wanna suck u.

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And so the poster says to the apple ........ Your not my dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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