Q: what happens when you eat all the potatoes A: there all gone

what is light brown and looks like sand? sand

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding it in your nose.

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

What's uneducated, black, and over six feet tall? A light pole.

What is the priest favorite book? The Bible

What did the pacific ocean do to the Atlantic ocean? He waved.

What person looks most like Jim Carry? Jim Carry

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The colour of their skin.

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Sgt. Richard, here... your son was raped many times by Iranian soldiers, then forced to make love to many goats and had his limbs chopped off.. he will never be able to walk, talk or poop without assistance again. OH MY GOD, NO!.. WHY!!! Haha just kidding mam, he stepped on a landmine and died.

What did Steegers say when he lost his TARDIS? "The niggers stole it again!"

Why did the boy fail gym? He had cancer and had to amputate both of his legs.

Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

Why did the tractor run over the little boy? because he was in the way!

Why was the woman terrified of being screened by the TSA? Because she's embarrassingly obese, liked most Americans.

Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

Why was the sea green? because a whale took a piss

What did the stop sign say to the no smoking sign? Stop

LIE

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

69

how do you kill a Jewish person? you don't that just fucking mean!

What did the rabbit say to the frog? If you think the rabbit said anything, you need to see a psychiatrist.

roses are red, voilets are creepy, i can beat you in call of duty

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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