How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

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who broke the little boys window? his abductor/rapist.

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Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

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What's black and buried in my backyard? An African American, I'm a member of the Ku Klux Klan

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding it in your nose.

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How do you treat a homeless man? Like any other person, you disgusting fuck.

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Today I looked at a clock and realized that I was late.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?

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Why was the sea green? because a whale took a piss

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how do you double your cash? You rip it in half.

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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what is light brown and looks like sand? sand

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Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

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roses are red, voilets are creepy, i can beat you in call of duty

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A plane is flying low over New York City. It's low on fuel and needs to land.

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A man walks into a bar and utters profanity because he's hit his head on a protruding metal object that cannot move out of the way and has therefore made him look stupid because he neglected to walk around it.

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Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

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Q: What do you call a fly with no wings. A: Dying.

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Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

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What person looks most like Jim Carry? Jim Carry

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What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

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Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

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ObamaCare

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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