Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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What is the best type of pepper? Well, some people say that the yellow pepper is the sweetest and most delicious, although others prefer red, green or orange peppers.

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What does a homeless man eat for Thanksgiving? Half of a big mac he found in the dumpster

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Why do latins like soccer so much? Because it's a very popular sport in the whole world.

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82

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what is light brown and looks like sand? sand

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patient: Doctor, It hurts when I go like this. doctor: Don't do that.

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Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

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what did the ninja say to the watermelon nothing that was chuck norris's watermelon

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Two computers walk into a bar I forget the rest

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Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

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Why didn't Superman save the world trade center? He was in a wheelchair.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? It depends on if the person has a lightbulb of the correct size and wattage...

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who the hell keeps shiting in my garden

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how do you kill a Jewish person? you don't that just fucking mean!

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Allie said yesssssssss!

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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What happened when Satan met God ? Nothing, because neither Satan nor God exist.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 5 comfortably

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how do you make a baby cry? throw bricks at his face.

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Q: what happens when you eat all the potatoes A: there all gone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops