What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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For anti-joke.com, there should be a section called "Hot" that shows new jokes which are given 5 thumbs up or up. This way we would get new jokes on the popular section instead of having the same ones for a very long time. I know this isn't a joke, but thumbs up if you agree.

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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What does a homeless man eat for Thanksgiving? Half of a big mac he found in the dumpster

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What did the pacific ocean do to the Atlantic ocean? He waved.

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Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

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Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

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Why did the black man buy a gun?? He enjoys hunting legally

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Knock Knock Whos there? Me Me who? Oh sorry forgot you had alzheimers :/

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Q: what happens when you eat all the potatoes A: there all gone

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What's worse than breaking your leg? Finding out that your family has died due to an infection causing all of them to perish in horrible deaths

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N

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A man walks into a bar. What's missing? The joke.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who the hell keeps shiting in my garden

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So a Jewish Family walks into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

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What is the difference between a jew and a tree a tree is awesome and a jew is a jew

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Two computers walk into a bar I forget the rest

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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roses are grey violets are grey i am color blind

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Why didn't Superman save the world trade center? He was in a wheelchair.

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How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? It depends on if the person has a lightbulb of the correct size and wattage...

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69

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what is light brown and looks like sand? sand

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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