Yo momma is so fat... Her body mass is above average.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a scotch on the rocks. Realizing how strange this occurrence was, the bartender immediately calls the local news station and tells them there is a talking horse in his place of business and it would be in their best interest to come do a story on it, because the likelihood of them finding another story of this magnitude is quite slim.

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adam shagged katie lololol

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Knock knock. I HAVE A SHOTGUN

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What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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A man decides to commit suicide and jumps from the highest building in New York, he dies instantly on impact... the day was septermber 11th 2001, either way it was the end for the man

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What is the difference between a jew and a tree a tree is awesome and a jew is a jew

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? - I dont know man, but you're adopted.

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Ah, come in!

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Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

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What has five letters and sounds like "trucks?" Vroom

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what happened to the woman who was a prostitute? She was arrested because it is a crime

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N

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A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? Possibly because it saw some sort of reason to do so, and being a chicken. Doesn't see the danger in motor vehicles.

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Q: what happens when you eat all the potatoes A: there all gone

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Sgt. Richard, here... your son was raped many times by Iranian soldiers, then forced to make love to many goats and had his limbs chopped off.. he will never be able to walk, talk or poop without assistance again. OH MY GOD, NO!.. WHY!!! Haha just kidding mam, he stepped on a landmine and died.

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why did the woman cross the road? to get to her full time job as a lawyer.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 5 comfortably

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What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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What person looks most like Jim Carry? Jim Carry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops