What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What person looks most like Jim Carry? Jim Carry

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? It depends on if the person has a lightbulb of the correct size and wattage...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

knock knock your nana had a cardiac arrest and thankfull dead now

thumb_up thumb_down -17

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -41

A black man owns his own night club. He tells the white man to look out for his night club. The white man bangs his head. The black man says, I told you to look out, you have now bumped into my big club that I take out at night time.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

what kind of animals marriage is high? snails because It has home and car.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a black man on the moon? A problem What do you call 10 black men on the moon? A problem What do you call 100 black men on the moon? A problem What do you call ALL the black men on the moon? A very serious problem. We should probably try and rescue them.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

So a Jewish Family walks into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

thumb_up thumb_down -100

A Weight loss service that works

thumb_up thumb_down -104

How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

thumb_up thumb_down +93

Someone said you sound like an owl Who?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock knock who's there? A serial rapist, now open up. hmmm... Ok... 3 Days passed before they found the serial rapist dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Sgt. Richard, here... your son was raped many times by Iranian soldiers, then forced to make love to many goats and had his limbs chopped off.. he will never be able to walk, talk or poop without assistance again. OH MY GOD, NO!.. WHY!!! Haha just kidding mam, he stepped on a landmine and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A blond, a brunette and a redhead jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground last? Depends on their weight and drag co-efficient.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

patient: Doctor, It hurts when I go like this. doctor: Don't do that.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

thumb_up thumb_down -153

On a scale of Voldemort to Nigel Thornberry, how large is your nose?

thumb_up thumb_down +92

Anything Dane Cook says

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops