A guy walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

Why did Landry hit the man with a metal pipe? Because he was a rapist and wanted to remove his virgin status.

69

What did the moon say to the sun? "I am the moon."

When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

Why don't women like to have penises? Evidently women have different tastes than men in what body parts they enjoy having.

A man walks into a bar and utters profanity because he's hit his head on a protruding metal object that cannot move out of the way and has therefore made him look stupid because he neglected to walk around it.

What do you call a man with no body, just a nose? Nobody Knows.

Knock knock who's there? A serial rapist, now open up. hmmm... Ok... 3 Days passed before they found the serial rapist dead.

Why can all black people dance? I have no idea, quite frankly I find that to be a insensitve racial stereotype.

How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? It depends on if the person has a lightbulb of the correct size and wattage...

Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

Today I looked at a clock and realized that I was late.

Why do latins like soccer so much? Because it's a very popular sport in the whole world.

whats sixty-twelve and a half + one one sixty-twelve isn't a number

Wanna here a funny joke? Doug.

How do you call the smallest mouse on Earth? James.

what do you call a girl who sells sex for money? sally

i just want thumbs up so i feel better about myself.....

Allie said yesssssssss!

Yo momma is so fat... Her body mass is above average.

What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...