Is your refrigerator running? Go fuck yourself

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What did the moon say to the sun? "I am the moon."

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roses are red vioets are blue i have chlamydia now so do you....

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a scotch on the rocks. Realizing how strange this occurrence was, the bartender immediately calls the local news station and tells them there is a talking horse in his place of business and it would be in their best interest to come do a story on it, because the likelihood of them finding another story of this magnitude is quite slim.

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why didn't the food in your microwave warm up ? because you didn't press start.

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What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

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Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? Possibly because it saw some sort of reason to do so, and being a chicken. Doesn't see the danger in motor vehicles.

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Hey girl, the word of the day is "legs". So let's go home and research the origin of the term and possibly conduct other etymological studies.

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Get the FREE anti jokes app with loads and loads of anti jokes anywhere you go, even offline! All the funniest and most popular, and loads more new ones. Why not? After all, it's free! http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/hilarious-anti-jokes-lite/id438092279?mt=8&ls=1

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What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

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Q.why did the car crash? A.becaus eit was drivin by a sack of potatos.

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man? Melanin!

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So a Jewish Family walks into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

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A guy walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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A blond was driving her car one day when "Party in the USA" came one the radio. She put her hands up; however, she realized she had to keep control of the car. She put one hand back on the steering wheel and arrived to her destination safely.

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Today I looked at a clock and realized that I was late.

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whats sixty-twelve and a half + one one sixty-twelve isn't a number

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69

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When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

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i just want thumbs up so i feel better about myself.....

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What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

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Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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