Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Ah, come in!

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How do you make a clown sad? Throw a brick at him.

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Q: What did one raccoon say to the other? A: We do not know, as raccoons do not speak any human language. And no human being can understand or communicate with one.

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A guy walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

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Why was young Timmy crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

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What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

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Allie said yesssssssss!

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a Chinese man an and a southern red neck walked into a country club and the chinese man got jumped and he left with no money

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What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

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Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Q: What do you call a fly with no wings. A: Dying.

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Why can all black people dance? I have no idea, quite frankly I find that to be a insensitve racial stereotype.

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Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.

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Why did the boy fail gym? He had cancer and had to amputate both of his legs.

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Dear diary, its day 230, the apple supply's are running low, the doctors are closing in, the dentists have been chanting "its time to go to the dentist" all day, I wont be able to hold them back much longer, help.

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he is Jewish

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What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

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A man heard a thundering sound. It was thunder.

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69

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A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

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What's the difference between Skittles and black people? ...I like Skittles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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