Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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A guy walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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What do caterpillars fear most? Death.

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Today I looked at a clock and realized that I was late.

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whats sixty-twelve and a half + one one sixty-twelve isn't a number

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A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender felt bad and gave him $20.

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What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

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What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

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Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

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Is your refrigerator running? Go fuck yourself

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Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

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What did the moon say to the sun? "I am the moon."

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Nero, its not that, people are leaving left and right, you where right when you told me that I was holding into the remains of a rotting corpse, the underground society is dead and money alone will never bring it back, but I got the funds and you the talent, is there nothing that can be achieved? You are a lawyer, you write novels, you live a family life, you work for who the hell knows what organization, is this what you traded your, or if I may say, our legacy for? I dont suspect you Nero, I am disappointed in you, part of me wishes you where a backstabber, rather than the one that just quit.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet with his great grandmother who got rushed to hospital due to having an epileptical seizure and is in life threatning conditions.

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Why was the woman terrified of being screened by the TSA? Because she's embarrassingly obese, liked most Americans.

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How do you treat a homeless man? Like any other person, you disgusting fuck.

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A labrador, a chihuahua, and a great dane walk onto a bar. They are strays and were brought to the pound where they were more than likely put down or adopted.

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Q: What was so funny about the death of Michael Jackson? A: There wasn't anything funny. He was one of the best pop stars ever and many people loved him.

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Why did the boy fail gym? He had cancer and had to amputate both of his legs.

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground last? Depends on their weight and drag co-efficient.

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What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

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What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

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what happened to the woman who was a prostitute? She was arrested because it is a crime

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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