A black man walks into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder. The bartender asks "Where did you get that?" The monkey replies "Africa, there are thousands of them."

How did Eric Clapton's son fall to his death? He crawled out the window.

why are black peroples noses so big ? because thats where God held them when he spray painted them

what's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? the holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? three bee stings.

Q: What do you call a fly with no wings. A: Dying.

what do you call a girl who sells sex for money? sally

What's the difference between Skittles and black people? ...I like Skittles.

Allie said yesssssssss!

What happens when you swallow a battery? You turn into one.

Anti jokes SUCK!

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar, which happens to be holding a support group for dyslexic people tonight. The name of the bar and all patrons are palindromes to avoid confusion.

Why did the chicken cross the road ? Possibly because it saw some sort of reason to do so, and being a chicken. Doesn't see the danger in motor vehicles.

Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

Three women, a blonde a brunette and a readhead, jump out of an airplane without wearing parachutes. And this is why women should stay in the kitchen.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet with his great grandmother who got rushed to hospital due to having an epileptical seizure and is in life threatning conditions.

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

What do caterpillars fear most? Death.

What's long and yellow? A yellow tube.

Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

A. Four gay men walked into the bar there was one stool left what did they do? B. They flipped the chair upside down By grant c

How do you make a clown sad? Throw a brick at him.

Why did they name the cat Salty? I have no idea, ask his owner

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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