Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Knock knock who's there? A serial rapist, now open up. hmmm... Ok... 3 Days passed before they found the serial rapist dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I black guy was walking down a street when he saw a beautiful women and said to her that she looked lovely

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Get the FREE anti jokes app with loads and loads of anti jokes anywhere you go, even offline! All the funniest and most popular, and loads more new ones. Why not? After all, it's free! http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/hilarious-anti-jokes-lite/id438092279?mt=8&ls=1

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than breaking your leg? Finding out that your family has died due to an infection causing all of them to perish in horrible deaths

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the moon say to the sun? "I am the moon."

thumb_up thumb_down

What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What items don't float? A school bus full of children

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a black piano player? You call him a pianist who plays a black piano. However, that really doesn't seem all that short, so you may just want to call him by his name, whether it be Bob, Jeff, or Ronaldo.

thumb_up thumb_down -84

A guy walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Whats better than 1 dollar? 2 dollars.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

how do you have a great time in a college town you don't

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Dear diary, its day 230, the apple supply's are running low, the doctors are closing in, the dentists have been chanting "its time to go to the dentist" all day, I wont be able to hold them back much longer, help.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Passing by

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What happens when you swallow a battery? You turn into one.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

what did the ninja say to the watermelon nothing that was chuck norris's watermelon

thumb_up thumb_down +84

Most of men think: the bigger dick they have, the more pleasure they can give to woman. Most of women don't thinks so, becouse they haven't got a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the girl say when the boy asked her out? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

"An alcohol walks into a man. He is a family and is destroying the bar." Says the drunk man to the bartender who wrote it on Anti-joke.com.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Three women, a blonde a brunette and a readhead, jump out of an airplane without wearing parachutes. And this is why women should stay in the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Allie said yesssssssss!

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Knock knock. I HAVE A SHOTGUN

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops