Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

roses are red vioets are blue i have chlamydia now so do you....

i just want thumbs up so i feel better about myself.....

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

How did Eric Clapton's son fall to his death? He crawled out the window.

Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

"An alcohol walks into a man. He is a family and is destroying the bar." Says the drunk man to the bartender who wrote it on Anti-joke.com.

Who's white and tries his best? Steve Nash

What's the difference between Skittles and black people? ...I like Skittles.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet with his great grandmother who got rushed to hospital due to having an epileptical seizure and is in life threatning conditions.

Allie said yesssssssss!

What happens when you swallow a battery? You turn into one.

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

A black man enters a bar. The bartender approaches him, and asks "who will it be?" The black man pulls out a gun and robs the bar, he is then arrested ten days later.

What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he is Jewish

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

- What's green and invisible? *holds out empty hand* - This cabbage

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Why was the woman terrified of being screened by the TSA? Because she's embarrassingly obese, liked most Americans.

Whats worse than finding a worm guts in your apple? Being raped by a alien with no arms then passed on to his comrades to be raped for the rest of your life.

A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender felt bad and gave him $20.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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