What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

a Chinese man an and a southern red neck walked into a country club and the chinese man got jumped and he left with no money

Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Ah, come in!

Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

What do you call a black piano player? You call him a pianist who plays a black piano. However, that really doesn't seem all that short, so you may just want to call him by his name, whether it be Bob, Jeff, or Ronaldo.

How do you treat a homeless man? Like any other person, you disgusting fuck.

Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

How did Eric Clapton's son fall to his death? He crawled out the window.

Why was the little girl screaming? She was on fire. ~G TY

Q: What did one raccoon say to the other? A: We do not know, as raccoons do not speak any human language. And no human being can understand or communicate with one.

Quess what the trash man did today? He took my trash.

Q: how many people with adhd does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: wanna go ride bikes?

The term "serial killer" is a bit strong...i prefer "ghost manufacturer"

Why did Landry hit the man with a metal pipe? Because he was a rapist and wanted to remove his virgin status.

Q: What was so funny about the death of Michael Jackson? A: There wasn't anything funny. He was one of the best pop stars ever and many people loved him.

I black guy was walking down a street when he saw a beautiful women and said to her that she looked lovely

A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

Dear diary, its day 230, the apple supply's are running low, the doctors are closing in, the dentists have been chanting "its time to go to the dentist" all day, I wont be able to hold them back much longer, help.

What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he is Jewish

KSI

What's the difference between a Pogo-stick and a Unicorn. A lot actually.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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