Is your refrigerator running? Go fuck yourself

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What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he is Jewish

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What'd yellow and can"t swim. A black person with a yellow shirt on.

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- What's green and invisible? *holds out empty hand* - This cabbage

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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What happens when you swallow a battery? You turn into one.

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What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

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Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

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What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Ah, come in!

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Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Sgt. Richard, here... your son was raped many times by Iranian soldiers, then forced to make love to many goats and had his limbs chopped off.. he will never be able to walk, talk or poop without assistance again. OH MY GOD, NO!.. WHY!!! Haha just kidding mam, he stepped on a landmine and died.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

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A black man walks into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder. The bartender asks "Where did you get that?" The monkey replies "Africa, there are thousands of them."

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Anything Dane Cook says

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What is the best type of pepper? Well, some people say that the yellow pepper is the sweetest and most delicious, although others prefer red, green or orange peppers.

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what happened to the woman who was a prostitute? She was arrested because it is a crime

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Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

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What did the pacific ocean do to the Atlantic ocean? He waved.

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A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

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Who's white and tries his best? Steve Nash

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a Chinese man an and a southern red neck walked into a country club and the chinese man got jumped and he left with no money

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops