How did Eric Clapton's son fall to his death? He crawled out the window.

thumb_up thumb_down +70

What do caterpillars fear most? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A black man owns his own night club. He tells the white man to look out for his night club. The white man bangs his head. The black man says, I told you to look out, you have now bumped into my big club that I take out at night time.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Is your refrigerator running? Go fuck yourself

thumb_up thumb_down +6

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman were stuck on a desert island, because they were touring investment property islands off the coast of Dubai and their boat had engine trouble. They were eventually picked up in a helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Nero, its not that, people are leaving left and right, you where right when you told me that I was holding into the remains of a rotting corpse, the underground society is dead and money alone will never bring it back, but I got the funds and you the talent, is there nothing that can be achieved? You are a lawyer, you write novels, you live a family life, you work for who the hell knows what organization, is this what you traded your, or if I may say, our legacy for? I dont suspect you Nero, I am disappointed in you, part of me wishes you where a backstabber, rather than the one that just quit.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the woman cross the road? to get to her full time job as a lawyer.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

- What's green and invisible? *holds out empty hand* - This cabbage

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

thumb_up thumb_down -106

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you call the smallest mouse on Earth? James.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you make a clown sad? Throw a brick at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the difference between Skittles and black people? ...I like Skittles.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What items don't float? A school bus full of children

thumb_up thumb_down -27

If Earth is a triangle, then why are trees smart? Because turtles have 4 legs

thumb_up thumb_down -99

What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what do you call a dead baby in a blender? -taken care of. by: Calee^_^•

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the boy fail gym? He had cancer and had to amputate both of his legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What'd yellow and can"t swim. A black person with a yellow shirt on.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet with his great grandmother who got rushed to hospital due to having an epileptical seizure and is in life threatning conditions.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops