Allie said yesssssssss!

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What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

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Knock knock. I HAVE A SHOTGUN

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what's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? the holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? three bee stings.

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a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman walk into a bar. they all wish me happy birthday bearing gifts. except there's no rabbi. or priest. or shaman. I'm not in a bar. I'm in my room. alone. i spent most of my birthdays that way.

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Why can all black people dance? I have no idea, quite frankly I find that to be a insensitve racial stereotype.

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What did the moon say to the sun? "I am the moon."

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Q: What did one raccoon say to the other? A: We do not know, as raccoons do not speak any human language. And no human being can understand or communicate with one.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

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Why was the woman terrified of being screened by the TSA? Because she's embarrassingly obese, liked most Americans.

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How Long Is A Chinaman's Name

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Yo momma is so fat... Her body mass is above average.

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What's the difference between a Pogo-stick and a Unicorn. A lot actually.

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7>6

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Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

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A black man walks into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder. The bartender asks "Where did you get that?" The monkey replies "Africa, there are thousands of them."

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? Possibly because it saw some sort of reason to do so, and being a chicken. Doesn't see the danger in motor vehicles.

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Don't look! I'm naked! No, seriously! I'm naked!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Ah, come in!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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