What kind of cat has no tail? Manx cat

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What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

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why didn't the food in your microwave warm up ? because you didn't press start.

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What's an Animal? A natural periodic state of rest for the mind and body, in which the eyes usually close and consciousness is completely or partially lost, so that there is a decrease in bodily movement and responsiveness to external stimuli. During sleep the brain in humans and other mammals undergoes a characteristic cycle of brain-wave activity that includes intervals of dreaming. ... are you retarded? yes how did you know?

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? -taken care of. by: Calee^_^•

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet with his great grandmother who got rushed to hospital due to having an epileptical seizure and is in life threatning conditions.

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a Squirrl climded a tree to get a nut

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If Earth is a triangle, then why are trees smart? Because turtles have 4 legs

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What happens when you swallow a battery? You turn into one.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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what happened to the woman who was a prostitute? She was arrested because it is a crime

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A black man owns his own night club. He tells the white man to look out for his night club. The white man bangs his head. The black man says, I told you to look out, you have now bumped into my big club that I take out at night time.

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Whats better than 1 dollar? 2 dollars.

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what is worse than the holocaust harry' ear acne

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How do you make a clown sad? Throw a brick at him.

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why did the woman cross the road? to get to her full time job as a lawyer.

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Why did the boy fail gym? He had cancer and had to amputate both of his legs.

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What'd yellow and can"t swim. A black person with a yellow shirt on.

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What items don't float? A school bus full of children

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Whats worse than finding a worm guts in your apple? Being raped by a alien with no arms then passed on to his comrades to be raped for the rest of your life.

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What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

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How did Eric Clapton's son fall to his death? He crawled out the window.

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What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

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What's the difference between a Pogo-stick and a Unicorn. A lot actually.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops