Why did the chicken cross the road ? Possibly because it saw some sort of reason to do so, and being a chicken. Doesn't see the danger in motor vehicles.

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang-rape.

A man decides to commit suicide and jumps from the highest building in New York, he dies instantly on impact... the day was septermber 11th 2001, either way it was the end for the man

Anti jokes SUCK!

Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

A Man walks into a bar, he sits down on a stool and begins to cry. Why are you crying, asks the Bartender. I just lost my job, my wife left me and I had my car reposesed. Ok says the Bartender, I know what'll cheer you up, he promptly pulls out a 12 inch piano and begins to play. The Man at the Bar says, hey thats awesome where did you get it? The Bartender says, a really old Genie gave it to me. You know what, I like you so I am going to let you have my last wish. Really? Asks the man, Ok thanks, I wish for a million bucks said the man at the bar. There was a Loud voice saying "Your Wish has been granted" then the room was full of ducks. Hey! Exclaimed the man, I didn't wish for a million ducks, I wished for a million bucks! Yeah, said the bartender, and I wished for a 12 inch penis...

Q: What do you call a fly with no wings. A: Dying.

roses are red vioets are blue i have chlamydia now so do you....

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A black man walks into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder. The bartender asks "Where did you get that?" The monkey replies "Africa, there are thousands of them."

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

You know what's addicting? Heroine.

What did the girl say when the boy asked her out? Yes.

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman were stuck on a desert island, because they were touring investment property islands off the coast of Dubai and their boat had engine trouble. They were eventually picked up in a helicopter.

Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

what do you call a girl who sells sex for money? sally

Why did they name the cat Salty? I have no idea, ask his owner

Passing by

Yo momma is so fat... Her body mass is above average.

What happens when you swallow a battery? You turn into one.

Why couldn't the 10-year-old go to the moon? Because it's the Moo-oo-ooo... no you can't come!

What do caterpillars fear most? Death.

What's long and yellow? A yellow tube.

What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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