Why did they name the cat Salty? I have no idea, ask his owner

thumb_up thumb_down -18

roses are red vioets are blue i have chlamydia now so do you....

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What do you call two black guys on a bike? Unsafe operation of a bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -96

Why does the little boy play video games all the time? Because he is socially awkward and has no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What did the Jew get for Christmas? A ride to a Concentrtation Camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's the difference between a terrorist and Bill Gates? One founded a successful software company, and the other commits mass murder of civilians for political gain.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How did bob survive the explosion? He wasn't at the explosion.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why was the woman terrified of being screened by the TSA? Because she's embarrassingly obese, liked most Americans.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

adam shagged katie lololol

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender "one beer please." the bartender proceeds to go into shock as a duck just talked to him

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's an Animal? A natural periodic state of rest for the mind and body, in which the eyes usually close and consciousness is completely or partially lost, so that there is a decrease in bodily movement and responsiveness to external stimuli. During sleep the brain in humans and other mammals undergoes a characteristic cycle of brain-wave activity that includes intervals of dreaming. ... are you retarded? yes how did you know?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is the worst part about being a black Jew? Having to sit at the back of the gas chamber.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q: how many people with adhd does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: wanna go ride bikes?

thumb_up thumb_down -114

Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Wanna here a funny joke? Doug.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why was the little girl screaming? She was on fire. ~G TY

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what happend when a blind guy tried to save a guy from a fire big mistake they both died

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Don't look! I'm naked! No, seriously! I'm naked!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do the Japanese hate more than sitting in traffic? tsunamis.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A kid falls off a cliff and dies. Who cleans them up? A bear.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you make a clown sad? Throw a brick at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops