Knock knock It's open

What do caterpillars fear most? Death.

Why did The chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

What do you call two black guys on a bike? Unsafe operation of a bicycle.

Why couldn't the 10-year-old go to the moon? Because it's the Moo-oo-ooo... no you can't come!

Why did the autistic man cross the road? He was also depressed. It was a highway.

What did the Jew get for Christmas? A ride to a Concentrtation Camp.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.....

A man goes to a Korean-owned dry cleaner to pick up his suits. They were impeccably cleaned at a reasonable rate.

the battle of waterloo

Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

A six foot chicken, a horse, and a muskrat walk into a bar. They are then detained by animal control and the bar undergoes a thorough cleaning.

how do you know a chinese person has been in your house? #1 your homework is done #2 your computer is upgraded #3 when you get home there still pulling out of your driveway

Hey girl, the word of the day is "legs". So let's go home and research the origin of the term and possibly conduct other etymological studies.

What'd yellow and can"t swim. A black person with a yellow shirt on.

Stephen Hawkings was ice skating on the Eiffel Tower... then he woke up.

A horse walks into a bar and orders a scotch on the rocks. Realizing how strange this occurrence was, the bartender immediately calls the local news station and tells them there is a talking horse in his place of business and it would be in their best interest to come do a story on it, because the likelihood of them finding another story of this magnitude is quite slim.

Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: slightly aged post it note glue

Wanna here a funny joke? Doug.

What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

What's the difference between a terrorist and Bill Gates? One founded a successful software company, and the other commits mass murder of civilians for political gain.

What's worse then ten dead babies being nailed to a tree? Being the one to take them down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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