How can you tell which kids belong to Dolly Parton? From the strech marks on their lips :|

Good for him. Thats wonderful!

How do you get a small freckly boy to stop watching television. You turn off the television.

Rock, paper, scissors, ebola

A priest, a rabbi and an imam walked into a bar and had a great time because all of them worship the same God. (Obs: The imam ordered only soft drinks)

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a pair of shoes and gloves

Your mom is so stupid, she decided to go back to school.

What is black and white and red all over. A blackboard.

how do you know a chinese person has been in your house? #1 your homework is done #2 your computer is upgraded #3 when you get home there still pulling out of your driveway

Kid walks into principals office Principal: do you know why I called you down here. Kid: yeah, I punched a kid at lunch. Principal: that's not why I called you down here

what did the kid say when he could not find his shoe? wheres my shoe?

y do churches have kneelers?, cuz it puts less stain on ur knees

what did the chicken say to the farmer? nothing, chickens dont talk.

A man walks into a bar and walks up to the counter. The bartender looks the man up and down and asks "Can I help you?" "Ya, get this guy off my ass" the duck promptly replies.

Whats stupid and has words? THIS JOKE!

Q)Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl go to the toilet? A)Because the P is silent.

What do you call a kid with headgear and one leg? Names.

Why did the autistic man cross the road? He was also depressed. It was a highway.

Q:What did the goat die? A: I dont know everything dies

Once upon a time, there was a man named John. John loved pancakes

So this guy's taking a hooker back to a hotel room, right? The woman turns out to be a federal agent investigating prostitution in inner-city inviornments, and the man is promptly arrested. He is now subject to a large fine and 90 days in a county jail.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: slightly aged post it note glue

What's a tissue's favorite kind of music? Nothing, tissue's do not have ear canals or ear drums and there for cannot hear any type of sound wave.

What do you call two black guys on a bike? Unsafe operation of a bicycle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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