Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street, Paddy says to Murphy, "Alright Murphy? How's the kids?" Murphy says to Paddy, "Not bad, thanks."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did one potato say to the other. Let's get baked!( hope u dont mind that this isnt a anti-joke well i dont know what it is so sue me)

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q - what did one plate say to the other? A - FOods on me tonight!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A Japanese woman walks into a Korean deli, and asks the Korean man if she can buy some groceries. They are able to get past their cultural differences, and share their favorite recipes.

thumb_up thumb_down

What does KFC stand for? Kids Fattening Center

thumb_up thumb_down

What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a drunk irishman? A cab.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you crash an airplane? By not knowing how to fly it.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' cheese

thumb_up thumb_down

a dyslexic Satan worshiper sold his soul to Santa

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats hairless, looks like a bel end and stinks of onions. Adey Bradley

thumb_up thumb_down

What happened to the boy who wanted to jump off a cliff? He jumped off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down

A friend asks his buddy, "Hey, what's your favorite color?" Buddy slowly turns his head and stares intensely at the only black person in the room and says," "White." Buddy has never been called racist.

thumb_up thumb_down

nine...eleven

thumb_up thumb_down

Gabe Mercado

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is the difference between a doorknob? Toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red Violets are red I murdered the gardener

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are gray. Violets are gray. I am a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the pirate not get in to the pirate movie it was rated arrrrrr

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops