Roses are red Violets are red I murdered the gardener

babe whos moaning? are you with another woman? guy:god damn if you would stay in the kitchen we would never have any problems.

A man walks into a zoo. There is only one animal, a dog. It's a shitzu.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

What do you get when you cross a cantaloupe and a dog? "Melon-choly"

What does an owl and a mole have in common? They both live underground, apart from the owl

Why was the boy with a green and blue collared shirt holding a bottle of rice dead at the bottom of the sea? Because he was pushed of a boat and couldn't swim.

Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

Q:Whats worse than 100 babies in 1 dumpster? A:1 dead baby is 100 dumpsters.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Flappy Bird is no where near as annoying as you!

Why did the girl run across the street? Because she was being chased by a man with a knife

Type 17 diabetes. Hepatitis R. Pubic Lice. Just Pubic Lice.

If it looks like chicken and tastes like chicken but Chuck Norris says it's beef, politely correct him. He is actually a very sensible fellow and will probably thank you for doing so.

A: Knock! Knock! B: Who's there? A: Kitchen B: Kitchen who? A: GET THERE!

A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

What's worse than discovering that you have contracted HIV? Stumbling upon a mass genocide. HIV's pretty bad though.

Why did the monkey fall of the tree? Because Newtons law states that we are all under the influence of gravity and hence an object, in this case the monkey, will fall down if it failed to stay on the tree.

I just read the long joke posted earlier. I have no life. :(

A man sees his friend and asks jokingly, "Hey is that ketchup or blood on your face?" The friend replies, "No, I ate your family," and shoots the man in the head with a rifle.

Why did the Chicken commit suicide Because he Ms. Reed

69

Light Yagami. I'm a gay light bulb :D

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Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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