Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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Knock knock GET OUTTA HERE! Jesus Christ dude I just came for some eggs!....

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baby loves lalma

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Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

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knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

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What abou three times

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Life is an abstract object incapable of handing out gifts, thus if given a lemon by life you should go to a doctor to make sure you don't have an undiagnosed disease.

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What turns red and explodes in a microwave A cat

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Penis.

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And now, A cow pretending to be a man: Jeff: Alan, are you a cow? Alan: What?! No! Cow: Yah me neither you guys want to go skatebords? *Awkward*

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what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

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If you are a girl reading this! why did you stop making some food?

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Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

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Do is the Most Famous Line on youtube Answer- Do the Flop

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How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

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What happened to the adventurer ? He took an arrow to the knee and became a guard.

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why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

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How many blind people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Does it matter?

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How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I would think one would be sufficient, though political affiliation shouldn't have anything to do with the situation. Unless the lightbulb was residing in a specified meeting place for members of the Republican party. Also, if the building was a more public institution for gatherings, which could imply larger ceilings, then two might be needed, just for safety precautions.

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What did the white man say to the muslim? Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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