A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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I was the bigger man in the argument. The person I was arguing with is now unconscious.

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chuck norris's tears cure cancer, to bad chuck norris never cries

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What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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How do you keep someone in suspense? I'll tell you tomorrow.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

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have you ever noticed that when geese are flying in a V, that one side is longer? Do you know why? no...why? There is more on one side

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What's better than winning a medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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why did the man scream? he stubbed his toe on a door

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Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

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"why did the chicken cross the road?" "to get to your house" "knock knock" "who's there?" "The chicken"

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Once my grandpa said: Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I said: No. Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I unplugged his life support.?

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A red house is red. A blue house is blue. What color is the green house? Clear they are made of glass.

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Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

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'Knock knock' 'who's there?' 'Whinny the poo' 'Whinny the poo who?' 'Whinny the poo'

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Woman's rights

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Yo momma so hot she won a beauty contest and was later shot and killed by the jealous losers

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What do you get when you cross a cantaloupe and a dog? "Melon-choly"

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind. Also, she's been dead for 43 years.

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whats retarded and looks like a fat duck? GEorge goodburn

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What do you eat when you watch porn? Corn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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