wat did the candle say to the lighter? nothing candles cant speak because they are inamimate objects, even so i think a candle would just scream anyway, would you buy a screaming candle?

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knock knock? whos there? eatmop. eatmopwho? HAHAHAH EAT MY POO

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Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

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A man named Cecil walks into a bar. He then orders a drink.

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Justin Beiber and a speaker = no hearing within a 25 mile area

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Q: why are black people so good at basketball? A: because the can shoot and steal:)

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How do you make a bllind person cry? Slowly cut off their toes.

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Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

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The same girl who got cancer for christmas had a birthday soon after, as a present She got kimo...but it failed

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Why did the baby cross the road? It doesn't matter. He was hit by a bus.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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Who's gay and has buttsex? Dan.

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Whats red and hurts if it hits you in the face? a brick

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Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Boobs In The Third Grade? A. Because She's 21

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What abou three times

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I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

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OMG guess what she just told me!! idk......im deaf.

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What happened to the alligator who waled into a bar? He was killed and skinned by swamp hunters in Louisiana.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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A minor walks into a bar. He's not very good at limbo.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

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The Irish man was sober.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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