What did the parrot say to the cow? Moo

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Why did the man go to the barber? To get a haircut

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That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

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a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

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"Hell nahhh I called shotgun" -Rosa Parks

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What do you call a pakistani with a backpack on a plane? A passenger with ordinary hand luggage

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Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frost bite.

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whats yellow sticky and smelly? I dont know i was asking you

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Q: Whats better than getting raped by a dog? A: Getting raped by a cat.

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Why was 6 afriad of 7? Because 7 is a rapist.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You poker face.

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guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

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B: Laro tayo . G: Anong laro ? B: Taguan . G: Bakit ngayon pa ? B: Because tonight will be the night that i will fall for you . G: Ulet ? B: Over again . G: Wag na ! B: Don't make me change my mind . G: Bukas na lang . B: I won't live to see another day . G: Weh ? Di nga ? B: I swear its true . G: Bakit kasi taguan pa ? B: Because a girl like you is impossible to find . G: Ano ? B: You're impossible to find . ? :)

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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A Jew sits down next to a muslim at the bar. They great and discuss their day's events, they both order beers. Then they go home.

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68 :)

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What do a grape and a plane have in common? They both have wings... except for the grape!

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Friends are like pickles. If you eat them, they die.

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gdfhtrfcgsexdfchrthgdfggfhtdtfhdtyfgfdfcghfgdyghhyrtfgrdfdffdtgdfgfghrthfg Alzheimer's.

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knock knock.. who's there? ted? ted, who? STOP f***ing around, you got cancer!

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Marijuana

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This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

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Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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