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What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

i want to eat a horse out jaffa cake

What is the different between a blonde and a rock? nothing.

A rabbi walks into a bar mitzvah

Why do women hate getting shot? They die.

What can Harry Potter NOT see with his glasses? His parents...alive.

hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

Whats worse then failing ur English test? Getting hit by a train

What do you call a dog that's half poodle, half bulldog? A dog.

Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

Q. How is a monkey like a tricycle? A. They both have handlebars... except for the monkey.

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

Hey

what did the boy say to the girl? make me a sandwich.

Why did the jew pick up the unicorn lying on the sidewalk? Because he dropped it.

what did the comedian tell the audience? a joke.

Anti-Joke Memes? That Shouldn't Be A Thing

A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

four people walk into a maze with a billion dollars in the middle.the people are santa clause, the easter bunny, a smart mexican, and a dumb mexican. Who gets the money. oviously the dumb mexican gets it. why you ask. because the other three are not real.

One muffin doesn't say anything to another muffin while baking in an oven because they lack the organs necessary to attain properties of speech and thought

Whats the difference between a car and a dead child? I don't have a dead baby in my basement.

When life gives you lemons...you probably just found lemons.

What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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