A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch."

"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

The Irish man was sober.

What turns red and explodes in a microwave A cat

3 men walked into a bar... They sat down and had a beer.

What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

Why did the man throw his watch out the window? Because it was broken.

A man walks into a bar. I don't know what happened next because I was waiting outside for my friend.

A catholic priest held a puppet show at a kindergarten. The children were a very polite audience and the event was considered a great success.

What disease did the gay man get from his partner? Streptococcus!

Smart Blondes

What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

Larry stopped by today to drop of a package. The package was a bomb. So I gave the "gift" to my neighbor for her birthday. My Mom is my neighbor.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

Why was the man afraid of the pack of wolves? The man was blind and heard his stomach growling even though he had just eaten two buckets of KFC.

Roses are red, violets are blue and the sun is very hot

yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned about her health

What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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