What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?? Where's my tractor?

why did the dog go inside the church? cuz the door was open.

Guess what? No.

Whats the difference between a car and a dead child? I don't have a dead baby in my basement.

what did the frog say to the princess? nothing because frogs do not possess sufficient linguistic skills to communicate with humans

Why did the two men kiss? Because they were both homosexual and attracted to members of the same sex.

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who took a shit in my garden?

Did you hear about the elderly bank robber? Me neither.

Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

Yo mama's so fat that when she stepped on a scale, she saw her ex-boyfrien's phone number!

why do they call it history? Women didn't do shit

A guy walks into a bar and orders a water because he's the designated driver

A blond, a brunette, and redhead are trapped on an island. They all try to swim across shark infested waters to the mainland. While they're swimming, the blond turns to the redhead and says, "This water is mildly cold." The redhead replies "Yeah."

I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

what does brb mean? ...be right back? ...ok hurry i need to know the answer.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her what her name is

I'd type a joke about dicks but it's too long.

What did the man do with his bread He ate it

Women.

Can you see this brett? Connor

9/11

heres a great game to play... DEATH TO BABIES!

roses are red, violets are blue, get in that bed or I stick your head down the loo! Christian grey

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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