Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

baby loves lalma

What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

Halo < COD

want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

Whats red and hurts if it hits you in the face? a brick

Q: How do you fit 100 mexicans in a van? A: Its theoretically impossible.

What abou three times

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

What turns red and explodes in a microwave A cat

Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

What do you call an asian guy in a police uniform? A police officer.

3 men walked into a bar... They sat down and had a beer.

There's no "i" in tim.

Why was jimmy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face

When you're climbing up a ladder and you feel something splatter, you may want to see what happened, and then promptly clean up the mess so one one slips.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

A fish swims up stream for his natural spawning cycle. The fish was out of shape and died from heart failure.

Why did the little girl get a haircut? A; she has cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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