What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

What happens when a man and a woman really love each other?... - They'll most likely go on a date and enjoy themselves.

How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

What's worse than an avalanche? Being raped in prison.

why did the cookie go to the docter he felt crumpie

What's funnier than somebody spitting in someone else's food? It's not even funny, it's just plain rude and disgusting.

what do you say when you see a winner weaner

Why did the chicken cross the road? No particular reason. It probably wasn't even aware the the ground it was crossing is what's termed as a road.

Two cows are in a field one cow says moo the other cow say shit thats what i was gonna say

Why do showers in Germany have 11 holes? Because a regular human on has 10 fingers.

R.I.P Ryan Dunn.

Why was the woman's purse so heavy? Because it had a lot of stuff in it.

Why are black people so tall ? Genetics. duh.

Why did the man get thrown out of the cinema? The man began to masturbate. He was also blind.

Anti-Jokes is addicting, you know what else is addicting? Heroine.

Charlie Sheen walks into a bar, he relapses.

Why did the elephant cross the road? It's an elephant. Who's going to stop it?

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

Knock knock SCREW YOU I BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

Yo mamma is so nice, when she bakes a batch of cookies, there's enough for everybody.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...