I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

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What abou three times

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why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

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What's a small person? A midget

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Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

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The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

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What happened to the alligator who waled into a bar? He was killed and skinned by swamp hunters in Louisiana.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

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#1 rule in arguments: if losing, start correcting their grammar

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24!

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Penis.

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And now, A cow pretending to be a man: Jeff: Alan, are you a cow? Alan: What?! No! Cow: Yah me neither you guys want to go skatebords? *Awkward*

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When is a bus not a bus? When it explodes.

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A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

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A minor walks into a bar. He's not very good at limbo.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

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you want to hear a joke? sure... too bad

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If you are a girl reading this! why did you stop making some food?

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Why did the child step on a ball?

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Potato.

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What happened to the adventurer ? He took an arrow to the knee and became a guard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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