How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

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Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

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If you are a girl reading this! why did you stop making some food?

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Potato.

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How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Goofy sold Pluto into slavery in exchange for the power of human speech.

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There's no "i" in tim.

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what's funnier than 3 dead babies in a trashcan pretty much anything thats not funny

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That didn't hurt.

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why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. Ask me if I'm a bush. Are you a bush? No.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John John who John

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool? A: A man with no arms or legs in a pool.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Why did the man fall over? he had a stroke.

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What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

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Do you know what would happen if you were to like this Anti-Joke? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... I would get another like.

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What do you call a gay man who has sex with a woman? A bisexual.

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What is a man with no arms and no legs on a pile of leaves? A quadriplegic who enjoys the fall.

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A boat drowns in the middle of the water. Everyone dies except for an Asian guy. Why did he live? Because he could swim.

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Stevie Wonder has put on a lot of weight since the 70's. I feel really bad for him because he can't watch what he eats.

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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