What did the man say when he turned on his car? AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHH!

What do you eat when you watch porn? Corn

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

What is underneath Chuck Norris' Beard? His Chin

I grammer is gooder then yours.

i eat poop

If it looks like chicken and tastes like chicken but Chuck Norris says it's beef, politely correct him. He is actually a very sensible fellow and will probably thank you for doing so.

What did the sea say to the sand? Nothing, he just waved.

Yo mama is so fat, she is thinking of going on a diet.

What looks like a 50p and has a narrow back?

Gabe Mercado

Q: What cracks while having sex? A: The pelvis of a four year old...

what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

What do you call a man with no heart? Dead.

i would like to know if the rumors about the moon being made out of chees is true because nobody told me it was CC

How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

Why can't I believe it's not butter? Because it is butter.

Don't you spell Pewdiepies name like "Pewdipie" than Pew-die-pie? Like who wants to kill a pie?

What did the child who tried to hang himself, but wasn't heavy enough to achieve breaking his neck do? Died slowly.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

Q:Whats worse than 100 babies in 1 dumpster? A:1 dead baby is 100 dumpsters.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

A man sees his friend and asks jokingly, "Hey is that ketchup or blood on your face?" The friend replies, "No, I ate your family," and shoots the man in the head with a rifle.

Friends are like penguins because when you throw a polar bear at them they die

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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