How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I'm a like whore

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats brown and sticky? A peice of poo

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Yo momma so thin, she admitted herself into an in-patient counseling center for anorexic and bulimic patients.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why are these jokes so funny? Because they're NOT!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

That awkward moment when the moment isn't awkward.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call nacho cheese? Stolen.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

larry clark i smoke pot and im gay its phillup

thumb_up thumb_down -12

The Sentence Below is True The Sentence Above is False

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call 2 tigers, a zebra, and a walrus? A small zoo full of 4 animals

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Ask me if I am a truck. Are you a truck? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A pussy walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bar keeper asks " why are you such a pussy!" The pussy then says, "it's not my fault I'm a cat!" before getting run over

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. I didn't ask him.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why did the poet kill the blackchicken? as a source of inspiration for his poultry

thumb_up thumb_down -18

a guy gets knocked out and wakes up in a alley all bloody and a knife next to him!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What became of the girl who drank shellac and died? Her poor father attempted CPR for three hours straight before being forced to give up on his child's life. A massive funeral was held; everyone she ever knew attended. It was a very sad affair.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats the worse than dieing of cancer, dieing alone and having AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops