what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Poke her face? No slap her bum!

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Why did Superman stop collecting stones? Did he ever? Moral: Yes but his kryptonite collection seemed to slow him down at times... until he stopped...

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Alt F4

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The Sentence Below is True The Sentence Above is False

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A pussy walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bar keeper asks " why are you such a pussy!" The pussy then says, "it's not my fault I'm a cat!" before getting run over

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What did the prostitute eat for lunch? Nothing because she was too busy performing oral sex for money.

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

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What is 2+2? 4!

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What did the blind and deaf woman get for her birthday? Raped.

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What do A Canary and a Groundhog have in common? Nothing, Groundhogs can fly, and Canaries can't dig.

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Yo mama's so ugly that the majority of people find her physically unattractive, but I hear her personality if great.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a jar filled with money. He asks the bartender, "What`s all this money for?" The bartender replies, "It`s Breast Cancer Awareness month and we are collecting donations." The man puts in $5, and continues on with his night.

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A kid walked into a bar, but was kicked out immediately as state law mandates you must be 21 to be withing 12 feet of an operable bar.

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A woman walks out of the kitchen.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had alopecia.

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A guy hit his elbow. Judaism.

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Did you hear about the 2 guys who wanted to go to rome? They didnt go

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Q: Why do Japanese people have eyes that look like they're stretched to the side of their head? A: When they are born, they come out head first, and their eyes are stretched to the side of their head and are stuck in that position due to the sticky, glue like substance found inside a woman's stomach.

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whats brown? poop.

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You sneak behind it and hit a shovel across its head.

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how do you take a shit in public? pull down your pants and push in public

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

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Q: What is worse than The Apocalypse? A: Darkseid, Thanathos, Red Hulk, Onslaught, come on The Apocalypse cant even beat the X-men! Moral: "I AM THE APOCALYPSE, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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