Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the turkey call the chicken? Nothing, turkeys can't speak, idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Snooki want smoosh smoosh

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mother is a man.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock Come In.......

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock Whose there? Get out of the bathroom Get out of the bathroom who? No, your in the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the skeleton say to the man? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red violets are blue i have deep vein thrombosis .... perpendicular albatross

thumb_up thumb_down +8

hiya im writing this coz im drunk and ktieally slumped over the keyobard i feel relaly sick man and i dunno why i;lm teling you this, coz i should reallyt nbe om nrd ny noe. goodnight antijokers

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Ok, I'll go ask someone else.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the woman's purse so heavy? Because it had a lot of stuff in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Josh Hamilton walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than 1,000 babies stapled to 1,000 trees? 1001 babies stapled to 1001 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why do showers in Germany have 11 holes? Because a regular human on has 10 fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a blind, crippled, child? Unlucky.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Yo mamma's handwriting is so bad that its barely legible to most people!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Watching your house burn down and your family scream in pain as their flesh burns and you suffer from chronic depression.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops