I have a crush on my dad.

Enchilada

If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

a man walks into a bar it hurt

Why did the chicken cross the road? How did the chicken get out of the henhouse?

Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

What do you put on top of salad? Salad Dressing.

What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

Do you have a curfew? No its saturday!

Whats big, yellow and red? a school bus with a bunch of dead children.

'Knock knock' 'who's there?' 'Whinny the poo' 'Whinny the poo who?' 'Whinny the poo'

Why did the fat guy get a gun? Because he was tired of all the fat jokes...

Two guys walk into the woods an saw a naked lady.One guys ran away. When his friend met up with him he ask why did u run away. He siad "my mom said if i a naked lady that i would turn to stone and i felt myself getting hard."

What did Connor say to the fat man? Dude ur extremely fat.

What is the unltimate Jewish dilemma? Free pork

What do you call a drunk irishman? A cab.

What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

asparagus

Doctor: your mom has cancerous aids Me:*sob*

9/11/2001

WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

i would like to know if the rumors about the moon being made out of chees is true because nobody told me it was CC

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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