A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks the clerk how much a television costs. He said that they don't serve blondes. The blonde files a lawsuit and is victorious by ruling of descrimination.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. Ask me if I'm a bush. Are you a bush? No.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John John who John

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Q: What's a Mexican's favorite sport? A: Cross Country

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What do you call a gay man who has sex with a woman? A bisexual.

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What is a man with no arms and no legs on a pile of leaves? A quadriplegic who enjoys the fall.

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Q: How do you get a one armed blond of of a tree? A: You grab a ladder and help her down safely.

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What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

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Stevie Wonder has put on a lot of weight since the 70's. I feel really bad for him because he can't watch what he eats.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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What's the diffrents beetween a carrot and a dead baby? One I like to eat in my soup, the other one s a carrot.

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what red black and white al over? a t.v I was kidding about the red part

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas Mittens

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Did you hear the story about the divorcee who was concerned about ecology? Her husband had been hitting her. Good for her to get away from that kind of abuse.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

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What's after 9/11? 9/12

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http://anti-joke.com/

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A guy and a girl look at a dog licking his crotch and the guy utters "damn I wish I could do that" The girl says: I can totally do that! "really? prove it" the guy says. The girl walks towards the dog and says "you just need to pet him so he don't bite you"

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whats the best way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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Why wouldn't the man in a wheelchair see out the window? The curtains were closed

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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