why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

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knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Life is an abstract object incapable of handing out gifts, thus if given a lemon by life you should go to a doctor to make sure you don't have an undiagnosed disease.

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Yo' momma's so fat, she has an increased risk of cardiovascula disease and may die.

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What turns red and explodes in a microwave A cat

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Penis.

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And now, A cow pretending to be a man: Jeff: Alan, are you a cow? Alan: What?! No! Cow: Yah me neither you guys want to go skatebords? *Awkward*

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Do is the Most Famous Line on youtube Answer- Do the Flop

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what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

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How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

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why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

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How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I would think one would be sufficient, though political affiliation shouldn't have anything to do with the situation. Unless the lightbulb was residing in a specified meeting place for members of the Republican party. Also, if the building was a more public institution for gatherings, which could imply larger ceilings, then two might be needed, just for safety precautions.

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How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Goofy sold Pluto into slavery in exchange for the power of human speech.

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What's worse than missing Taco Tuesday? Your whole family dying in a car crash.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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So a black man, a white man and a latina walk into a sentence that doesn't end how you expected it to.

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Why did the man fall over? he had a stroke.

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what did the black man say to the white man? hi

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What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

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why did the boy named rylie white get aids Because he had unprotected sex with someone with aids.

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How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

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Q: What's a Mexican's favorite sport? A: Cross Country

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What's the diffrents beetween a carrot and a dead baby? One I like to eat in my soup, the other one s a carrot.

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What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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