Why did I get raped

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knock! knock! whos there!?! abandoned baby!

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't like anyone who is not a straight, white male.

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sometimes josh roberts sees how many things he can get in his bumhole befor is starts to bleed.

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What did the umpire yell to the flatulent player at bat? FOUL BOWEL!

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What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing Because she had no arms Why did the boy drop his ice cream Because he was hit by a truck. and geuss who was driving the truck? The girl with no arms

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John: Do you like Cake? Sue: Yes. John: Alright.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

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Q) why did jimmy kick the bucket. A) Because his dad is an alcoholic and Beats him to the point of near death, so He takes his anger out by kicking anatomit Objects such as a bucket.

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I smacked my crotch with the back end of a hammer. I got a free vasectomy.

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Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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What did the man say to the horse in the bar? Nothing, communication requires listening and comprehension which horses cannot process in their brains. If anything the man said it at the horse, not to him.

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Christians pornstars.

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Yes, finally caught that mouse!

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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I have glasses but cannot see I have feet but cannot walk What am I? A riddle.

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Sorry boss

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what happened to the autistic child that traveled to antarctica? he died.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock who's there? the chicken

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What's a small person? A midget

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Friend: I hope you burn in hell -.- Me: I hope you step on a leggo in the dark Friend: *gasp* take that back

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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