When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

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What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

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Im Jackson Sinclair and Me and Carter Weeks-69;)

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hiya im writing this coz im drunk and ktieally slumped over the keyobard i feel relaly sick man and i dunno why i;lm teling you this, coz i should reallyt nbe om nrd ny noe. goodnight antijokers

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What did the skeleton say to the man? Nothing.

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

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Video Games

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What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

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whats the difference between a rapist and a pedophile? the racist has his own whistle

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What do you call a really dumb girl with downs? Ashley Howard

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how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

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How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

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How do you get an elephant in pajamas? Elephants are large mammals with several layers of body fat, and pajamas are for humans. there is no purpose in attempting this feat at all.

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How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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The penn state football administration

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Why was the woman's purse so heavy? Because it had a lot of stuff in it.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

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Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

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Why was the black man running away from the cops? He was running a relay race.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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What do you call a cow in the grass... A cow in the grass... Dumbas*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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