What do you call an asian guy in a police uniform? A police officer.

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knock knock go away ok

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A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

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A) Knock Knock. B) Who's There? A) Me. B) Oh, well I'm in the shower, just give me five minutes. A) OK, I'll wait in the kitchen, is it cool if I heat up a hot pocket? B) Yeah sure, just not the pepperoni one, I only have one left and I was saving it for lunch. A) Alright.

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Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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If you are a girl reading this! why did you stop making some food?

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Potato.

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What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

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What's worse than missing Taco Tuesday? Your whole family dying in a car crash.

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Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

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Penis-Pump

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What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

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How did Suzy die She choked on a Pick-Up Truck

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Q: What did Hellen Keller say to the pizza delivery man A: Stop raping me.

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What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

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why did the boy named rylie white get aids Because he had unprotected sex with someone with aids.

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

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Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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