What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

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Whats Mary short for? Shes got no legs

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Kumquats, daffodils, and potato salad.

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Why cant Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish.

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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Why did Mary fail to consume her breakfatst? Because Suzy has a history of bi-polar disorder as well as anorexia.

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How do you confuse a Mexican? several large eggs

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Dislike if you are gay (watch how many dislikes this joke gets :P)

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Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

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di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

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What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

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Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

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Im Jackson Sinclair and Me and Carter Weeks-69;)

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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A horse walked into a bar. Animal control was immediately called and the horse was returned to it's original owner.

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How did Bob fall off the swing? He had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? He had no arms. What did Bob get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do you call poop in a black man's toilet? Poop.

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What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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Why was the baby crying? Because a tree fell on its legs.

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What do you call a really dumb girl with downs? Ashley Howard

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No particular reason. It probably wasn't even aware the the ground it was crossing is what's termed as a road.

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What did the skeleton say to the man? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops