How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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What's funnier than somebody spitting in someone else's food? It's not even funny, it's just plain rude and disgusting.

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What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No particular reason. It probably wasn't even aware the the ground it was crossing is what's termed as a road.

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Why was the baby crying? Because a tree fell on its legs.

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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Ok, I'll go ask someone else.

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

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(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

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Wow, that makes your name a lot more comfortable to say... Not type, and you seem to be more sensitive than non-red hair girls. Besides its really nice, why do you dye it? Is it like red or ginger?

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What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

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What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new home? No. Neither has he....

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Why did the man get thrown out of the cinema? The man began to masturbate. He was also blind.

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I used to be an inventor, but I had other ideas.

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Nipples+poop= good stuff. Hellllll yeaaahhhh

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Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

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What's better than winning a medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why didn't Jim go to the party? He wasn''t invited.

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Yo mamma is so nice, when she bakes a batch of cookies, there's enough for everybody.

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Once my grandpa said: Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I said: No. Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I unplugged his life support.?

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What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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