Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't like anyone who is not a straight, white male.

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Whats worse then a pile of dead babies? One live baby at the bottom, eating its way out.

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you

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Whats worse than finding a black man in your bed? After you sleep with him, he tells you he has AIDS.

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Why was the pilot suspended from flight? He was the terrorist who caused 911. OUCHH

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Q: What is worse than The Apocalypse? A: Darkseid, Thanathos, Red Hulk, Onslaught, come on The Apocalypse cant even beat the X-men! Moral: "I AM THE APOCALYPSE, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE!"

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What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

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Why couldn't the plane fly? The pilot was a muffin.

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Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

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Gracias por depositar mi dinero, y tener un buen día, adios.

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I smacked my crotch with the back end of a hammer. I got a free vasectomy.

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Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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You are reading this.Ya you the fat one

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fabien

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How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

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What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

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Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

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What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

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What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy walking into a bar, A couple of multicultural friends grabbin' a drink.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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What's better than getting to sleep in? Sex for the very first time.

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What's a small person? A midget

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Friend: I hope you burn in hell -.- Me: I hope you step on a leggo in the dark Friend: *gasp* take that back

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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