Why didn't the skeleton go to th party? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did Riley cross the road? A: I lied he started to then proceeded to get hit by a bus filled with children causing them all to be scarred for life.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A woman walked into a bar at least that is what she tells her friends about how she got a blackeye.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you kill a black guy With a gun

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Abe Lincholn had a son :) But he died |:

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the Mexican cross the road? To get home.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what did the boy say to the girl? make me a sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I had a grammar lesson yesterday. I learned how to speak more good.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why could the boy use the computer there was nothing wrong with him

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q. How is a monkey like a tricycle? A. They both have handlebars... except for the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shih-tzu? Dogs are large and solid objects and therefore cannot be mixed together.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Oh. So his name's Brandon.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why does Lady GaGa have no hair down there? It's physically impossible to grow hair on your toenails.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the man do with his bread He ate it

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops