What did the homeless man without legs and arms, get for Christmas? ... Cancer

Why did the Nazi shoot the Jew in the head? Because he was a Jew. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Three blokes walk into a bar. I'm british.

A priest, a rabbi, and a whale sit down at a bar. The priest says to the bartender, "Jesus Christ is our savior." The rabbi responds, "No. Our savior has not yet been born." To which the whale adds, "MMMUUURRRAAAAAAOOOUUU!!!"

A man walks into a bar. Now I have to kill you, because that's top secret information.

"Media Zombies" Sounds like the Nero I remember.

So, I was eating out this girl Until I tasted something like horse semen. So I looked up at her and said; " Ah grandma, so that's how you died ! ".

What's the difference between a Duck and Michael Jackson? A Duck has feathers and goes "Quack quack" and Michael Jackson touches little boys......

why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

Why is the women in the street selling her body for money? because she has 3 kids and a father with cancer.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

A blond and a redhead are walking down the street the red head says look a dead bird the blond looks up

A Haiku Haiku's are easy But Sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

How did Bob fall off the swing? He had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? He had no arms. What did Bob get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why was the black man escorted out of the bar? Civil rights is still a real issue in this country and must be solved.

Whats worse than 3 black guys. 4 black guys.

why are black people good at basketball? because they practice

A horse walked into a bar. Animal control was immediately called and the horse was returned to it's original owner.

guy 1: hey, i got a new dog. isn't he cute? guy 2: i just lit him on fire

Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

What did the mute say to his friend? Nothing.

What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

What is your favorite joke? I like bar jokes. Okay knock knock Who's there? A bartender A bartender who? A bartender walks into a bar but before he went through the door, he decided to knock on the door because this lame joke is so random.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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