How do you survive a plane crash?? You don't

What's worse than falling off your bike? Getting hit by a truck.

-Knock knock. -Who's there? -Doctor. -Docter who? -Yes...

So this guy's taking a hooker back to a hotel room, right? The woman turns out to be a federal agent investigating prostitution in inner-city inviornments, and the man is promptly arrested. He is now subject to a large fine and 90 days in a county jail.

Why did The chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

there are three dudes one is white, one is mexican, one is black so a wizard says wish of something you want to be and jump off the roof. so the white guy wishes to be and eagle and jumps off and is an eagle the mexican wishes to be an owl and jumps off an becomes an owl then the black guy wishes he had to shit and jumps off and falls to the ground cause he turns into shit.

3 jews sits in a car. Who drives? Not Hitler.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

A man walked into a store and asked if he could use the restroom. They found this acceptable and let him use it.

What did the hot rod say to the other hot rod Its hot in here

The NHL playoffs

what did the chicken say to the farmer? nothing, chickens dont talk.

what did the kid say when he could not find his shoe? wheres my shoe?

what does a black car sound like when it starts? RUN-NIGGA-NIGGA-NIGGA-NIGGA -GRANT PARK ALL THE WAY

Whats stupid and has words? THIS JOKE!

There's a blonde, Brunette and a Redhead stuck at the top of a cliff. A genie appears and says he will grant them each one wish. The Brunette wishes she could at the bottom of the cliff, The redhead wishes she could be back with her children and the blonde would just love to be back to her family. :/

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Anything you want, it's only a fish.

How did the gymnast fall off the beam? Got shot in the face

Q: What did one blind girl ask the other? A: Where are you?

What do you call a group of men terrible at their jobs? The Mets

y do churches have kneelers?, cuz it puts less stain on ur knees

What do you call a black person pushing a car? A very strong human being.

If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? No, the impact of the colliding objects being the tree and the ground causes a disturbance in the silence thus causing a sound. The tree gets too much credit.

What's a tissue's favorite kind of music? Nothing, tissue's do not have ear canals or ear drums and there for cannot hear any type of sound wave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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