What do you call a kid with headgear and one leg? Names.

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mooooh im a cow

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what do you call a girl who sells sex for money? sally

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Poverty.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Anything you want, it's only a fish.

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why did the stupid boy put his clothes on his valentines? because hes stupid

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What do the Japanese hate more than sitting in traffic? tsunamis.

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How do you get a small freckly boy to stop watching television. You turn off the television.

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Whats the difference between boyscouts and jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

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Why did the autistic man cross the road? He was also depressed. It was a highway.

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a dyslexic man can't spell a word, don't judge him

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A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender "one beer please." the bartender proceeds to go into shock as a duck just talked to him

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- What's green and invisible? *holds out empty hand* - This cabbage

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Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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whats red, white, and blue? idk go ask the president

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Knock knock It's open

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: slightly aged post it note glue

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A six foot chicken, a horse, and a muskrat walk into a bar. They are then detained by animal control and the bar undergoes a thorough cleaning.

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What did the girl say when the boy asked her out? Yes.

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What'd yellow and can"t swim. A black person with a yellow shirt on.

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? Literally an endless list of things.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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A robot walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "can I get you a drink?" The robot replies, "No, I'm a robot."

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What's long and yellow? A yellow tube.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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