What did the working mother get her son for Christmas? Empty promises.

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What do you get when you cross a polar bear and a vampire? A Vampire Polar Bear.

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Q: What did one blind girl ask the other? A: Where are you?

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a man walks into a bar..... OWW!!!!!!

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What do you do when there is a truck on the interstate? Nothing.

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How do you get a small freckly boy to stop watching television. You turn off the television.

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A boy eats 3 pounds of candy, 2 whole pizzas, and drinks 10 beers. Why did he puke? Someone came out of nowhere, and kicked him in the nuts

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How do you survive a plane crash?? You don't

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Q: How many apples grow on a tree? A: All of them

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Why did the autistic man cross the road? He was also depressed. It was a highway.

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Roses and red, Violets are blue, This type of poem, Must always rhyme.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling Kill him

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-Knock knock. -Who's there? -Doctor. -Docter who? -Yes...

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a dyslexic man can't spell a word, don't judge him

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Q:What did the goat die? A: I dont know everything dies

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Once upon a time, there was a man named John. John loved pancakes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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A man walks into a Scottish bar and sits down. Another man sitting at the end of the bar recognizes him and says "Hello, I've heard of you, I must ask, how did you get your name?" He replies, "You see that wall out there, protecting the town? I built it with me own 2 hands, so they call me Jon the Wallbuilder.

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what did the chicken say to the farmer? nothing, chickens dont talk.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

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what's famous and sounds like a type of food? a famous artist's name slightly modified to include the name of a food

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Why did the man explode when he ate the cheeseburger? Because the man was actually a bomb.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Anything you want, it's only a fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops