What do you call a fish with no eyes? Anything you want, it's only a fish.

If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? No, the impact of the colliding objects being the tree and the ground causes a disturbance in the silence thus causing a sound. The tree gets too much credit.

3 jews sits in a car. Who drives? Not Hitler.

Q: How many apples grow on a tree? A: All of them

How do you get a clown to stop smiling Kill him

what has 9 legs, 4 feet and is orange? nothing.

Q:What did the goat die? A: I dont know everything dies

Why did the man explode when he ate the cheeseburger? Because the man was actually a bomb.

why did the stupid boy put his clothes on his valentines? because hes stupid

What is black and white and red all over. A blackboard.

y do churches have kneelers?, cuz it puts less stain on ur knees

What is it called when a male and a male are together. A relationship

A priest, a rabbi and an imam walked into a bar and had a great time because all of them worship the same God. (Obs: The imam ordered only soft drinks)

who has no willy? robbie kearns

If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

After waking up at the break of dawn, a man saw his dogs food dish was empty. In slight excitement for his dog to finally eat after his dish being empty all night, he called his dog in from outside, expecting him to go straight to his food dish like always. The dog walked by without noticing.

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a pair of shoes and gloves

What's a tissue's favorite kind of music? Nothing, tissue's do not have ear canals or ear drums and there for cannot hear any type of sound wave.

What's really ugly and smells like a hampster? My hampster.

Kid walks into principals office Principal: do you know why I called you down here. Kid: yeah, I punched a kid at lunch. Principal: that's not why I called you down here

Q: Why were the two elephants kicked off the beach? A: They were both level 4 sex offenders.

Your mom is so stupid, she decided to go back to school.

Good for him. Thats wonderful!

what's famous and sounds like a type of food? a famous artist's name slightly modified to include the name of a food

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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