Once upon a time, a story teller used the "once upon a time" metaphor in order to tell you your parents have died in a terrible accident

What did the muffin say to the oven? Obviously nothing since neither one can talk.

Abe Lincholn had a son :) But he died |:

Hey

Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

Mr. Burns sex scandal.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

A bear walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be." The bear mauls his face off and kills several other patrons before police show up and fire three rounds in it's face.

Yo mama's so fat that when she stepped on a scale, she saw her ex-boyfrien's phone number!

Whats more crazy? Stabbing someone or killing someone? I don't know thats why I am asking you

What did timmy fall off the swings? He had no arms

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?? Where's my tractor?

Why did the Mexican cross the road? To get home.

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

Bin Laden comes out of a cave

Why didn't the pharmacist set up his business in the jungle? Because setting up a pharmacy in the jungle is not a viable business option.

Guess what? No.

four people walk into a maze with a billion dollars in the middle.the people are santa clause, the easter bunny, a smart mexican, and a dumb mexican. Who gets the money. oviously the dumb mexican gets it. why you ask. because the other three are not real.

so a guy says to his doctor "it hurts when i touch my leg" the doctor replies "but we cut it of last week" he promptly died with an infection in his leg

What Happened to the man with no arms? Nothing, he continued his life with his daily routine of using his feet to accomplish his goals that day.

What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

Dave: Say "game" ten times fast Bud: Game, game, game, game, gay ma, gay ma, I'm gay, I'm gay, I'm gay

Did you hear about the elderly bank robber? Me neither.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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