What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, animals can't talk.

Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

What do you call a black hitch-hiker? Stranded

Q: What's a Mexican's favorite sport? A: Cross Country

Dick spice

What is big and white, not the moon CC

Why didn't the boy buy his mom a gift for Christmas? He was killed by a drunk driver two years ago

If there's a clown in a blender, how do you get him out? Tostitos.

AHAHAHAHAHA XD I cant for the life of me imagine Donald Duck accusing anyone of being a seducer XD, my eyes are tearing up XD If I do not type anything more, its because I died of laughter and joy XD But those "cartoons" where made for adults, ever seen steamboat Willie? That is one of my favorites, I always liked Mickey Mouse a bit better, Donald kinda changed a lot.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I eat you and die of obesity due to high blood pressure and bad heart disease!!!

Person1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person2: I dunno.-. to get to the other side? Person1: :( I dream of a better tomorrow where a chicken can cross the street without having his motives questioned

Guess what? No.

There once was a man from Nantucket, whose dick was so long he could provide women with more pleasure than the average male.

What's the same between a plane a bird and a piece of celery? They all fly except the celery

A guy walks into a bar and orders a water because he's the designated driver

I walked down the street. I picked up a quarter. It was shiny. Then I walked to school. I finished school, so I walked home, did my homework, and went to bed. Lesson learned: quadratic formula

i'm on the sea food diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Wayne Gacy.

I had a grammar lesson yesterday. I learned how to speak more good.

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. He says, "I am what I am." The white guy says, "yes." The black guy says, "why did you say yes?" If he was black he would have said, "I is what I is.":):):):):):):):)<3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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