What did timmy fall off the swings? He had no arms

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Whats more crazy? Stabbing someone or killing someone? I don't know thats why I am asking you

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Yo mama's so fat that when she stepped on a scale, she saw her ex-boyfrien's phone number!

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A bear walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be." The bear mauls his face off and kills several other patrons before police show up and fire three rounds in it's face.

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Guess what? No.

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four people walk into a maze with a billion dollars in the middle.the people are santa clause, the easter bunny, a smart mexican, and a dumb mexican. Who gets the money. oviously the dumb mexican gets it. why you ask. because the other three are not real.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?? Where's my tractor?

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Why didn't the pharmacist set up his business in the jungle? Because setting up a pharmacy in the jungle is not a viable business option.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? To get home.

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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Bin Laden comes out of a cave

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Did you hear about the elderly bank robber? Me neither.

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Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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What happened to the blonde who walked up to the vending machine? She got a snack and went on with her day.

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Dave: Say "game" ten times fast Bud: Game, game, game, game, gay ma, gay ma, I'm gay, I'm gay, I'm gay

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas ? Cancer

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I'd type a joke about dicks but it's too long.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

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What Happened to the man with no arms? Nothing, he continued his life with his daily routine of using his feet to accomplish his goals that day.

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so a guy says to his doctor "it hurts when i touch my leg" the doctor replies "but we cut it of last week" he promptly died with an infection in his leg

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nevermind.

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knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

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Knock, Knock... Who's there An abandoned baby

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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