What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

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why didnt you take a shower? because my house burnt down

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Yo mama is so fat she went on a diet and lost weight.

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why was the Jewish child sad? He was recently abandoned by all his family.

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Ha

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Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

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Ian is cutie!!!!!;)

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

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what do outgoing girls get on spring break? raped.

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt will thank you.

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Where's my tractor?

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Q: What came first, the chicken or the egg? A: The egg, dinosaurs reproduced long before chickens existed.

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di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

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What did the Catholic Priest do to the 9-year-old boy? He ate him. The priest was actually Jeffery Dahmer.

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So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

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How do you make a baby cry? Hit it with a brick.

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Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a fox stapled to his face.

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What's grey and looks good on policemen? your mom.

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Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

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Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

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where did Bob go during the bombing attacks? All over the walls.

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whats worse than not getting what you want for christmas? a child melester

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Adam gives a new view of roid rage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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