A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Enchilada

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why was the man gay? because he likes men.

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What do you get when you cross a cantaloupe and a dog? "Melon-choly"

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why did the man scream? he stubbed his toe on a door

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An Irishman, a Mexican and an American sit a test. They all pass.

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how do you annoy people? make statuses from anti-joke.com

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You know what is better than winning a race in the Special Olympics? Winning two races.

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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Why did the man drink the milk? Because he was a baby.

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Why did the fat guy get a gun? Because he was tired of all the fat jokes...

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A christian was diagnosed with cancer. He refused chemo and prayed to god. Eventually, he died.

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Q: What's black and blue and hates sex? A: The 8-year-old boy tied up in my garage.

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How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

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why is nick a dumb ass? because hes not a smart ass

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Do you know what big feet mean. Big socks

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Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

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if a cat is mean and a dogs a bitch then what do u call your wife? A MEAN ASS BITCH

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babe whos moaning? are you with another woman? guy:god damn if you would stay in the kitchen we would never have any problems.

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Yeah? You like that? Its like art for some.

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Canida

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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Why did the black guy drown in the river?? unfortunately he owed 10,000 dollars to a loan shark and couldnt pay his dues So he was tied to an anchor and put in the river.

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what do you get when a bear and a man mix a really pissed off bear and a dead man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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