A pussy walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bar keeper asks " why are you such a pussy!" The pussy then says, "it's not my fault I'm a cat!" before getting run over

thumb_up thumb_down -15

The cow says MOO. Until you shoot it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's easier to get than a broke prostitute on the side of the street? Osama Bin Laden.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the prostitute eat for lunch? Nothing because she was too busy performing oral sex for money.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worse than doing the dishes with long sleeves? Finding out your girlfriend's been cheating on you.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is Earth made out of? Earth

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Is this some kind of a joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a car with no wheels or engine? Immobile

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A woman walks out of the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

wat did the candle say to the lighter? nothing candles cant speak because they are inamimate objects, even so i think a candle would just scream anyway, would you buy a screaming candle?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's worse than being hit by a mini van? Being hit by 5 mini vans.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Where does lady gags buy her bran flakes ? Sainsburys

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What happened to the Jew when he heard about the concentration camps being erected all over Germany? Nothing immediately. Then he and his family went into hiding where they were later discovered, taken to concentration camps and died along with millions of other Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern ppoorrnnoo-graphic collections.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? Nothing. It turns out it wasn't his wife, he was cheating on her with his mistress, the woman he was having sex with now, thus destroying their marriage.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't like anyone who is not a straight, white male.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

how did the little girl die cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q) why did jimmy kick the bucket. A) Because his dad is an alcoholic and Beats him to the point of near death, so He takes his anger out by kicking anatomit Objects such as a bucket.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops