A man walks into a bar. He has a drink. Then goes back home.

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What do you say the big head boy? Brush yo teeth

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hiya im writing this coz im drunk and ktieally slumped over the keyobard i feel relaly sick man and i dunno why i;lm teling you this, coz i should reallyt nbe om nrd ny noe. goodnight antijokers

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What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

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how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

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What do you call a really dumb girl with downs? Ashley Howard

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

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What do you call an alligator in a vest? An amphibious mammal wearing clothes. Why would you ask me that.

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Q: What do you get when Justin Bieber gets his own tv show? A: suiside!

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Why did Mary fall of the tire swing? Because she's a dumbass

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Teacher- "Sally Sue, a sentence that starts with I, please."\ Sally Sue- "I is..." Teacher- "no, no, Sally Sue, when you start with I, you must follow it with am." Sally Sue- "I am the 9th letter of the alphebet."

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Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

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What do chicken babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

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Yo mamma's handwriting is so bad that its barely legible to most people!

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What do you call a blind, crippled, child? Unlucky.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife just died from pancreatic cancer."

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Woman's rights.

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Q: What's the difference between a basket of tennis balls and a basket of dead baby heads? A: One is used for the sport of tennis the other is a basket of tennis balls!

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Why didn't the black man brush his teeth today? Because he was already too late for work.

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what's the difference between people and horses? people have two less legs.

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What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

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The Bible

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Why can't Sean slam dunk cos he has no arms -•#21

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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