How many blind people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Does it matter?

How do you spell Mississippi with out an i? You can't because removing an i from the word Mississippi would cause it to be spelled incorrectly.

What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. Ask me if I'm a bush. Are you a bush? No.

Cows go moo.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

Why grannies do not buy a menstrual pads? Cause they will never have their period anymore.

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

A seven year-old boy was jumping on a trampoline. He landed awkwardly and broke his ankle. This then became infected and caused him to be permenantly paralysed.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I am pregnant And it's your baby

Do you know what would happen if you were to like this Anti-Joke? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... I would get another like.

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, animals can't talk.

A man goes to a doctor to check about an itch on his testicles. Turns out it was just a rash and is promptly prescribed medication and it clears up in a week.

George Bush.

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

what do you call a man that just got brutally murdered? i don't know, check his birth certificate.

Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

Roses are red, violets are blue and the sun is very hot

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

i want to eat a horse out jaffa cake

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...