What did the black man get on his SAT's? -Barbecue sauce

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Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

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Why did Timmy stop running? He got hit by a bus

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How do you confuse a Mexican? several large eggs

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So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

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Kumquats, daffodils, and potato salad.

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A Jew sits down next to a muslim at the bar. They great and discuss their day's events, they both order beers. Then they go home.

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Whats Mary short for? Shes got no legs

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What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

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A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican guy walk into a bar. They are good interracial friends that like to put down some brewski's with eachother

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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What is white on top and black on bottom? Society

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What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

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(Two person joke for an audience Joke Teller. "What's the difference between a rabbit and a cowsay?" Accomplice "a what?" Joke Teller. "a cowsay?" Accomplice "what's a cowsay?" Joke Teller. "Mooooooo"

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What do you call poop in a black man's toilet? Poop.

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What do you get when you cross a zombie with a beer? Nothing because zombies are just another subject dealing with the occult.

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Why don't women need watches? Because they have clocks on their cell phones because they have jobs outside of the house and are INDEPENDENT WOMEN! MEN DO NOT DEFINE THEM!

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what did the cheese say to the wall? nothing cheese can't talk.

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A horse walked into a bar. Animal control was immediately called and the horse was returned to it's original owner.

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What do people in Asia do for black history month? Nothing, black history month is an American thing.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Snooki want smoosh smoosh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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