What happened to the guy that stuck his finger up his asshole? It felt GOOOOOOODD

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Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

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why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

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What do you do if you see a bleeding Mexican in your front yard? Quickly respond to the accident and supply the wounded victim with first aid.

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whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

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What do you call a black man in court? A lawyer.

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what do babies and prostitutes have in common they will both cry if you hit them with a brick

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? You haven't? Well neither has he

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

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a muslim, jew, and catholic went into a bar and sat down and had drinks. The muslim asks the jew "are you macrobiotic". the jew replies "no" and they go about their fun....

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How did Helen Keller meet her husband? On a blind date.

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Why did the family go to Mexico? Because they were deported

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock who's there? the chicken

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want to hear a joke? Woman's rights

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Who's gay and has buttsex? Dan.

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What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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what happened to the autistic child that traveled to antarctica? he died.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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What did the finger say to the thumb? Nothing, fingers can't talk.

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What do you call a group of white guys playing basketball in Philadelphia? Actually, that already seems like a pretty good summary of the situation.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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