Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

A man walked into a bar. It hurt.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks: "why that long face?" The horse, being a horse, thus not being able to comprehend the complexities of a conversation, says nothing and then shits on the floor.

A rabbi walks into a bar mitzvah

I'd type a joke about dicks but it's too long.

viki has 10 penises around her she eats 8 of them what does viki have? viki has AIDS

roses are red violets are blue i dont give a damn how bout you

Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

What did the man do with his bread He ate it

so a guy says to his doctor "it hurts when i touch my leg" the doctor replies "but we cut it of last week" he promptly died with an infection in his leg

Someone listens to an anti joke. They laugh.

What do you get when Chuck Norris meets Chuck Norris? A bad joke.

Nothing yet CC

guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

Why did Adele suck the doctors dick? LOL, did you think the doctor really got her to open her mouth all the time so he could "look at her sick throat"

why was the Jewish child sad? He was recently abandoned by all his family.

A black man walks into a bar. The man behind him ducks.

A muslim bought tickets for a 3pm flight. It was 11am, so in the mean time, he went to a bar to loosen up. His bomb vest accidently went off early, killing everyone in the bar. The flight arrived on-time in San Fransico.

What did the parrot say to the cow? Moo

I went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog, it was a shitzu

Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

Chuck norris eats nails for breakfast. This is most likely the cause of his bleeding stomach and acid reflux.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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