roses are red violets are blue i have deep vein thrombosis .... perpendicular albatross

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hiya im writing this coz im drunk and ktieally slumped over the keyobard i feel relaly sick man and i dunno why i;lm teling you this, coz i should reallyt nbe om nrd ny noe. goodnight antijokers

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Where does piglet look for Pooh? The hundred acre forest, you creep.

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what is a big jar and has a human in it? A human in a jar.

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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What did the turkey call the chicken? Nothing, turkeys can't speak, idiot.

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Why was the woman's purse so heavy? Because it had a lot of stuff in it.

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What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

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What do you call a orange striped zebra? No not a tiger stupid its a orange striped zebra duh!

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Ok, I'll go ask someone else.

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What does Free Candy and a Free game online have in common? They both have viruses

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Yo mama so fat!... we are very concerned for her health.

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A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

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(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

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roses are red violets are blue however some roses are pink

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What do chicken babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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"why did the chicken cross the road?" "to get to your house" "knock knock" "who's there?" "The chicken"

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No it isn't.

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Why did the man get thrown out of the cinema? The man began to masturbate. He was also blind.

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have you ever noticed that when geese are flying in a V, that one side is longer? Do you know why? no...why? There is more on one side

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I used to be an inventor, but I had other ideas.

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Why didn't Jim go to the party? He wasn''t invited.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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