According to standard table etiquette what is rude when someone passes you the salt? Jamming a fork in their eye

Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

What's worse than an avalanche? Being raped in prison.

What percentage of her brain does Sarah Palin use? 100%. That humans use only 10 or 30% of their brains is a myth.

What did the little girls who's parents died in a car accident get for her birthday? Foster Parents

Woman's rights.

What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

There's two men on a subway. One says "Hey, that's my sandwich.".

Women's Rights

What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

Why did the dog bark at the tall white man? Because the tall white man was in the process of attempting to rob the house in which said dog was situated. The dog was merely defending its patch.

roses are red violets are blue however some roses are pink

Charlie Sheen walks into a bar, he relapses.

Yo mamma's handwriting is so bad that its barely legible to most people!

Q: What's the difference between a basket of tennis balls and a basket of dead baby heads? A: One is used for the sport of tennis the other is a basket of tennis balls!

Why did the girl die? No one knows.

How do you keep someone in suspense? I'll tell you tomorrow.

Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street, Paddy says to Murphy, "Alright Murphy? How's the kids?" Murphy says to Paddy, "Not bad, thanks."

a man pulled up to a girl in a white van with tinted windows. he told the girl he had candy inside. she got in the van. he then proceeded to rape becasue he was a rapist and that is the lifestyle he choose to have.

What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

a man walks into a bar it hurt

Your mom’s so dumb she forgot to update her WordPress installation and now she has pharmaceutical links all over her page.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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