Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

why did Suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock? whos there not Suzie

Q: What came first, the chicken or the egg? A: The egg, dinosaurs reproduced long before chickens existed.

"Media Zombies" Sounds like the Nero I remember.

Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

A woman should not be in the kitchen.

What does Santa get for Christmas? Chikungunya Fever.

Matty B

What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he was angry and frustrated with the people in his life, and the ringing clock was the first thing he noticed in his depressed rage.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

Knock Knock Who's there? I'm going to kill your family.

A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

Why did the chicken cross the road? No particular reason. It probably wasn't even aware the the ground it was crossing is what's termed as a road.

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? To end her misery.

Your mother is so fat, that the doctor said, "Go on a diet or you will get a Cardiac Infarction."

hiya im writing this coz im drunk and ktieally slumped over the keyobard i feel relaly sick man and i dunno why i;lm teling you this, coz i should reallyt nbe om nrd ny noe. goodnight antijokers

I was the bigger man in the argument. The person I was arguing with is now unconscious.

What do you call a blind, crippled, child? Unlucky.

A Priest and A Rabbi Walk Into The Bar. Ouch.

What should you do when your refrigerator is running? Tell it to FREEZE!

I used to be an inventor, but I had other ideas.

why was the man gay? because he likes men.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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