You want to hear a joke? Adobe Flash Player.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a black guy who flies an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he was angry and frustrated with the people in his life, and the ringing clock was the first thing he noticed in his depressed rage.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Women Voting

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

There was a seal and polar bear on the same iceberg. The polar bear turns to the seal and says "Roar!!" Then the polar bear ate the seal.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's worse than an avalanche? Being raped in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you scare a 5 year old girl? Stick your dick out.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did Helen Keller say to a stranger at a party? I earned a Bachelor of Arts degree, wrote several books, traveled to over 39 countries, and was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, one of the United States' highest two civilian honors, from President Lyndon B. Johnson.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why do showers in Germany have 11 holes? Because a regular human on has 10 fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do chicken babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

thumb_up thumb_down +5

There's two men on a subway. One says "Hey, that's my sandwich.".

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Where did little Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Wow, that makes your name a lot more comfortable to say... Not type, and you seem to be more sensitive than non-red hair girls. Besides its really nice, why do you dye it? Is it like red or ginger?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock knock SCREW YOU I BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops