what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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The same girl who got cancer for christmas had a birthday soon after, as a present She got kimo...but it failed

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What do you call a pig sizzling in a pan? BACON!

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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baby loves lalma

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What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

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Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

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Chuck Norris drove to McDonalds and ordered a Whopper. Much to his dismay, McDonalds does not make Whoppers, because that is the signature fast-food burger of McDonald's biggest competitor, Burger King.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

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you will now laugh.

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a muslim, jew, and catholic went into a bar and sat down and had drinks. The muslim asks the jew "are you macrobiotic". the jew replies "no" and they go about their fun....

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What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

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What's a small person? A midget

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Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

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What do you call an asian guy in a police uniform? A police officer.

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What did the cripple kid get for Christmas? Cancer. You know what he got the next the next Christmas? Nothing he died.

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What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

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#1 rule in arguments: if losing, start correcting their grammar

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What did the rabbit say to the rabbi? ...RABBITS DO NOT TALK! So then the rabbi said, "In that case you must be a hare!"

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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Women's Sports

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Why couldn't Simon run? Because he had Cerebral Palsy.

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That didn't hurt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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