A jewish man is sitting on a bench. A german man then proceeds to sit down next to him. They say nothing to each other.

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Why didn't the black man pay child support? He had no children.

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John: Do you like Cake? Sue: Yes. John: Alright.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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I smacked my crotch with the back end of a hammer. I got a free vasectomy.

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Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

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Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

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Q) why did jimmy kick the bucket. A) Because his dad is an alcoholic and Beats him to the point of near death, so He takes his anger out by kicking anatomit Objects such as a bucket.

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Christians pornstars.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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I have glasses but cannot see I have feet but cannot walk What am I? A riddle.

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Sorry boss

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Hitler: I said PASS THE JUICE! not GAS THE JEWS!

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want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

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want to hear a joke? Woman's rights

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Why did the cookie go to the docter? Because he was dieing of terminal cancer.

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Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

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Why was the pencil case unzipped? Because it wasn't zipped up.

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What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

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#1 rule in arguments: if losing, start correcting their grammar

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Being a jew in the Holocaust.

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What is worse than a baby nailed to a tree? The holocaust. What is worse than 20 babies nailed to a tree? A baby nailed to 20 trees.

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A minor walks into a bar. He's not very good at limbo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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