If you are a girl reading this! why did you stop making some food?

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What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

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96

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What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

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Penis

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Society.

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What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

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A catholic priest held a puppet show at a kindergarten. The children were a very polite audience and the event was considered a great success.

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What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

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What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

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How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

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How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I would think one would be sufficient, though political affiliation shouldn't have anything to do with the situation. Unless the lightbulb was residing in a specified meeting place for members of the Republican party. Also, if the building was a more public institution for gatherings, which could imply larger ceilings, then two might be needed, just for safety precautions.

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why did the boy named rylie white get aids Because he had unprotected sex with someone with aids.

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A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

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How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

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what did the train say to the other train choo chooo

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What is the biggest lie in the universe? I love you.

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Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

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Q: What's a Mexican's favorite sport? A: Cross Country

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What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

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Stevie Wonder has put on a lot of weight since the 70's. I feel really bad for him because he can't watch what he eats.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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