Why do women hate getting shot? They die.

How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

Anti-Joke Memes? That Shouldn't Be A Thing

A rabbi walks into a bar mitzvah

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

A blond, a brunette, and redhead are trapped on an island. They all try to swim across shark infested waters to the mainland. While they're swimming, the blond turns to the redhead and says, "This water is mildly cold." The redhead replies "Yeah."

What do you call a black man working for Bank of America? A successful individual.

I had a grammar lesson yesterday. I learned how to speak more good.

I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

roses are red violets are blue i dont give a damn how bout you

What do you call a pregnant 8-year old? A poor reflection on our society

why did the baby die because it was diagnosed with lukimia

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

Jim: Knock, knock? Tom: Who's there? Jim: You're. Tom: You're who? Jim: You're a retard. ............................ Tom: You're mean, like a hobbit...

A man walked into a bar. It hurt.

What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

What's the difference between a Ginger and a Brick? A ginger is a living organism.

A black man and a jew both fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? the black man

Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange WHO? Knock knock? WHO'S THERE?! Orange Williams. Sorry, I suffer from debilitating OCD.

Two boys are playing with a toy submarine. One isists it will work in a real test. The boy drowns and the company is sued.

I went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog, it was a shitzu

There was a man from the hood, His limericks weren't very good, So he decided to become a purveyor of monogrammed handkerchiefs and other fine linen products.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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