A man walked into a bar. It hurt.

A black guy with his family.

Ill wait for you as long as you need Nero, I am just so glad you are alive and well... I know you, you would not be this chatty unless you where doing far worse, I know you will recover, dont think about the time for my sake, ill refresh this page every five minutes or so.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A game of one-on-one basketball in a common physical education class in present day mexico city.

A duck walked into a bar. He asked for a drink and the bartender gave him it

Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

Tifa, seriously... You cannot look like the game character and have the same name! HEY I am craving for a bit of infamy, how about we claim that we is I! Which will make me seem completely pathetic for spending the whole night chatting with myself... Which is not bad at all actually...

a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

Why are black people faster than white people? They are descended from a lineage where athleticism was more greatly selected for in the evolutionary process.

Whats Mary short for? Shes got no legs

Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

42

Person A - I farted Person B - YUCK

What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

Kumquats, daffodils, and potato salad.

YOU SUCK RYAN V!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! U SUCK BALLS!!!!!!!!!!!!

What did the Leah say to the Pawneez? AWWWW YEAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the dog's chin get all scraped up? He didn't have any front legs.

Q: What do you call a dyslexic Irish man with no legs? A: Handicapped

How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

Matty B

Nice weather we're having.

What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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