I have a crush on my dad.

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Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

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A Priest and A Rabbi Walk Into The Bar. Ouch.

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What does KFC stand for? Kids Fattening Center

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Woman's rights

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How do you keep someone in suspense? I'll tell you tomorrow.

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What's worse than locking your keys in ur at outside of an abortion clinic? Going in side and asking for a coat hanger!!

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Jesse ziggenfat hates his life. He's really obese. Just like his mom...and his sister...and his brother.....and his dad.... And his dog? Bacon?

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why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad. salads can't fly planes.

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I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

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Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

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Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

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What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

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how big is a midgets dick? i dont know but probably bigger then mine

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch." It was an Iron bar.

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how many rapists does it take to screw a lightbulb?

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A man got a promotion at work. Now he makes more money.

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a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

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how do you annoy people? make statuses from anti-joke.com

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Why did the man drink the milk? Because he was a baby.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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Roses are red Violets are red I murdered the gardener

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Hi my name is Jim

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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