#1 rule in arguments: if losing, start correcting their grammar

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A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

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what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

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And now, A cow pretending to be a man: Jeff: Alan, are you a cow? Alan: What?! No! Cow: Yah me neither you guys want to go skatebords? *Awkward*

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Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

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Potato.

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What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

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That didn't hurt.

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What's worse than missing Taco Tuesday? Your whole family dying in a car crash.

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Penis-Pump

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So a black man, a white man and a latina walk into a sentence that doesn't end how you expected it to.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

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why did the boy named rylie white get aids Because he had unprotected sex with someone with aids.

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what did the train say to the other train choo chooo

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How did Suzy die She choked on a Pick-Up Truck

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What is the different between a blonde and a rock? nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing finding a worm in an apple is disgusting because worms are disgusting creature that shouldn't live in an apple

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What do you call a black guy, a white guy, a mexican guy, and a chinese guy jumping out of a plane? Skydivers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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