what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

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Why did the little boy drop his Ice cream? He had no arms(:

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Q: What do you do when you find a black man bleeding from a bullet wound on your front porch? A: Call an ambulance! He may only have minutes to live before he bleeds to death! Hurry!

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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what do you do if you wake up at midnight and your tv is floating? -call the police because you caught a burgler in the act of stealing your tv

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The same girl who got cancer for christmas had a birthday soon after, as a present She got kimo...but it failed

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Q: What did the twin tower say to the other twin tower? A: I'm falling for you.

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What did the man do when he walked into the gym? Died of a brain aneurysm.

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How did the kid drop his ice he got hit by a train Griffin Cholette

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Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.

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How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Whats red and hurts if it hits you in the face? a brick

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Chuck Norris drove to McDonalds and ordered a Whopper. Much to his dismay, McDonalds does not make Whoppers, because that is the signature fast-food burger of McDonald's biggest competitor, Burger King.

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Friend: I hope you burn in hell -.- Me: I hope you step on a leggo in the dark Friend: *gasp* take that back

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Whats lemon scented and you shouldn't drink? Bleach

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why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

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What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy walking into a bar, A couple of multicultural friends grabbin' a drink.

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Why was the pencil case unzipped? Because it wasn't zipped up.

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Two women were sitting quietly.

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A fish swims up stream for his natural spawning cycle. The fish was out of shape and died from heart failure.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? By grounding her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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