What did the parrot say to the cow? Moo

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Hi

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Q: What did one candle say to the other? A: Nothing, the mere thought of candles being able to possess the ability of speech is preposterous beyond any of the highest capabilities known to man.

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What happened to the man that took too much viagra? His erection lasted longer than 4 hours, he's dead now

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Can you see this brett? Connor

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a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

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There once was a squirrel. He lost his nuts.

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What's bigger than the Loch Ness Monster? Loch Ness.

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a man is having trouble getting onto the internet on his home computer. so he he calls a computer technician to help him. \

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What did the girl say to the guy raping her? Stop.

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Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

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What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating

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Knock, Knock Who's there? A robber who will most likely kill you along with anyone else who will ruin their chances of becoming more wealthy off your most prized possessions.

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Humpdy dumpty sat on a wall and enjoyed his day off

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

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Knock, knock. Who's there? New Kids on the Block. Wait, who?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

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If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

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viki has 10 penises around her she eats 8 of them what does viki have? viki has AIDS

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what did the 3 hispanic men say to the fat guy? you're in our seats

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What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

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milk,eggs,butter,deodorant,chocolate syrup,chile powder,dildo,bacon

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your on a bus and you ask your math teacher if you got the answers on the homework right and the bus crashes in the middle of an intersection.

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Why did your mum have sex with my mum? Because they're lesbian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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