Whats Mary short for? Shes got no legs

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So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

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What's bigger than the Loch Ness Monster? Loch Ness.

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whats better than 24................. 25

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Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange WHO? Knock knock? WHO'S THERE?! Orange Williams. Sorry, I suffer from debilitating OCD.

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Kumquats, daffodils, and potato salad.

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What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

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b

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How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

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What do millions of men give their girlfriends every Christmas? AIDS.

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown, how mad would you be if i ate your golfish? Very angry, as my goldfish is not food.

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: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

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why did Suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock? whos there not Suzie

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how do you make a dog roll over you kill it

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Q: What came first, the chicken or the egg? A: The egg, dinosaurs reproduced long before chickens existed.

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Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

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What do you call a guy who set's pancakes on fire? Mentally confused, and in need of a psychiatrist.

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what did the cheese say to the wall? nothing cheese can't talk.

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Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

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why is liam baldy because his dad is too

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nick biggs ate a car well his name is nick BIGGS

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Whats worse than 3 black guys. 4 black guys.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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