what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

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Q: What do you do when you find a black man bleeding from a bullet wound on your front porch? A: Call an ambulance! He may only have minutes to live before he bleeds to death! Hurry!

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I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

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I smacked my crotch with the back end of a hammer. I got a free vasectomy.

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what do you do if you wake up at midnight and your tv is floating? -call the police because you caught a burgler in the act of stealing your tv

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The same girl who got cancer for christmas had a birthday soon after, as a present She got kimo...but it failed

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children driving off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? You haven't? Well neither has he

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I told a woman to make me a turkey sandwich. Of course she complied since I was at Subway.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

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What's a small person? A midget

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Q:Why did the booger cross the street? A:Because everyone was picking on him

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Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

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Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

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#1 rule in arguments: if losing, start correcting their grammar

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If you are a girl reading this! why did you stop making some food?

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When is a bus not a bus? When it explodes.

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A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

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Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

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you want to hear a joke? sure... too bad

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Do is the Most Famous Line on youtube Answer- Do the Flop

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How do you spell Mississippi with out an i? You can't because removing an i from the word Mississippi would cause it to be spelled incorrectly.

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What do you call a black hitch-hiker? Stranded

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what do you call a kid without arms and legs? names

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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