2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

knock knock go away ok

thumb_up thumb_down +39

if a kayak was stuck in a tree with its headlights on, how many pancakes stacked will it take to get to the moon? none because snakes dont have armpits

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the man throw his watch out the window? Because it was broken.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Whats worse than the holocaust? Being a jew in the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: What is a duck's favorite thing to smoke? A: Quack

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Smart Blondes

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What disease did the gay man get from his partner? Streptococcus!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man goes to a doctor to check about an itch on his testicles. Turns out it was just a rash and is promptly prescribed medication and it clears up in a week.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I am pregnant And it's your baby

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's better than winning gold at the special Olympics? Not being retarded. - Blake Woodman

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops