whats yellow sticky and smelly? I dont know i was asking you

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You poker face.

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Well, I have to go eat again "Axel Knight". See you around soon enough, just give me a call if you want me around... Hopefully I find a fucking telescope so I can read the code on the chip thingie... Damn I am hungry. See you around sugartits.

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This is you cat This is just cat This is wasted cat This is your cat This is time cat This is reading cat This is this cat Now read the third word of every sentance

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Kumquats, daffodils, and potato salad.

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What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

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gdfhtrfcgsexdfchrthgdfggfhtdtfhdtyfgfdfcghfgdyghhyrtfgrdfdffdtgdfgfghrthfg Alzheimer's.

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Q: What's the quickest way to a woman's heart? A: Through her ribcage.

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"Media Zombies" Sounds like the Nero I remember.

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Q: What came first, the chicken or the egg? A: The egg, dinosaurs reproduced long before chickens existed.

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Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown, how mad would you be if i ate your golfish? Very angry, as my goldfish is not food.

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So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

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poo poo you you doo doo too too

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"Up to 50% off."

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Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died.

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ugh good riddance

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what did the cheese say to the wall? nothing cheese can't talk.

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Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

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a

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how do you wake up lady gaga? scream in her ear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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