People are like cats, they both die when they're suffocated

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A man walked into a bar. It hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Tifa, seriously... You cannot look like the game character and have the same name! HEY I am craving for a bit of infamy, how about we claim that we is I! Which will make me seem completely pathetic for spending the whole night chatting with myself... Which is not bad at all actually...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Three facts 1. You are reading this. 2. You realized that is a stupid fact. 3. You are leaving because this was a stupid joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A duck walked into a bar. He asked for a drink and the bartender gave him it

thumb_up thumb_down +18

whats dirtier than lady gaga's penis in justin bieber's vagina? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is funnier than a barrel full of clowns? The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats Mary short for? Shes got no legs

thumb_up thumb_down +16

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Kumquats, daffodils, and potato salad.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's bigger than the Loch Ness Monster? Loch Ness.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange WHO? Knock knock? WHO'S THERE?! Orange Williams. Sorry, I suffer from debilitating OCD.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the dog's chin get all scraped up? He didn't have any front legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the Leah say to the Pawneez? AWWWW YEAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

b

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do millions of men give their girlfriends every Christmas? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops