Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

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What do you call a cow in the grass... A cow in the grass... Dumbas*

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What do you call a black guy who flies an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

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A man walks into a bar. He has a drink. Then goes back home.

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What percentage of her brain does Sarah Palin use? 100%. That humans use only 10 or 30% of their brains is a myth.

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A man walks into a bar... and recieves a concusion and short-term memory loss

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Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

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What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

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What should you do when your refrigerator is running? Tell it to FREEZE!

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your a towel.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did one potato say to the other. Let's get baked!( hope u dont mind that this isnt a anti-joke well i dont know what it is so sue me)

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Why did the girl die? No one knows.

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How did the man rape the woman? With his penis.

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What does KFC stand for? Kids Fattening Center

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What do you call a person who is 6 feet under? Lost.

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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What happened to the boy who wanted to jump off a cliff? He jumped off a cliff.

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Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

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Gabe Mercado

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What's up? A direction...

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Roses are red Violets are red I murdered the gardener

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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