Roses Are Blue Violets Are Purple Black is Purple Im colorblind

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Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them they die.

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Nikii manaj is 99.9% fake on her body

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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Knock knock Whose there? Interrupting doctor Interr-- You have cancer.

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What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

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Facebook...

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When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

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Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

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The Bible

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whats funnier than drews nose .... ??

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Why was the woman's purse so heavy? Because it had a lot of stuff in it.

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

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When the clock strikes the bell at elephantasourous during my erectionn i screw myself CC

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What did the great political leader say in order to calm the riot. There were no definable words. He merely screamed as the riot swallowed him and tore him apart.

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Knock knock Come In.......

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Woman's rights.

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What's worse than finding twelve dead babies nailed to a tree? One living baby nailed to twelve trees.

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What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

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What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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