Matty B

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Two boys are playing with a toy submarine. One isists it will work in a real test. The boy drowns and the company is sued.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? -because chickens have a free ability to walk and this chicken felt the urge to walk across the road. Why not?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

You are short with no perm, you will never be Kat Willams.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what do u call a person who reads anti.jokes a hipster

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's funnier than poop? More poop

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worst then the holocaust, titanit and 9-11 4 bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did Suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock? whos there not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What happened on December 7, 1941 in Hawaii? People celebrated the 100th anniversary of December 7, 1841

thumb_up thumb_down +10

nick biggs ate a car well his name is nick BIGGS

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

(Two person joke for an audience Joke Teller. "What's the difference between a rabbit and a cowsay?" Accomplice "a what?" Joke Teller. "a cowsay?" Accomplice "what's a cowsay?" Joke Teller. "Mooooooo"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was six afraid of seven? Because SEVEN-FIVE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

whats worse than not getting what you want for christmas? a child melester

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

There is a knock on the door. Little Jimmy comes dowstairs opens the door and standing in the door way is the axe wielding manic fromTexas Chainsaw.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Facebook...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's funnier than somebody spitting in someone else's food? It's not even funny, it's just plain rude and disgusting.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what is the difference between oral sex and anal sex? one has to deal with a butt

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops