Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

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What does a cupcake get for Christmas? A fat kid.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? By grounding her.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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When you're climbing up a ladder and you feel something splatter, you may want to see what happened, and then promptly clean up the mess so one one slips.

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How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

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What do you do when a guy pulls up in a van with piercings and a gay lisp, what do you do? Get in the van.

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What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

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Wikipedia has no entry on "gullibility."

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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what did the train say to the other train choo chooo

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Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

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Why are cemetaries gated? Typically, to prevent vandalism and the emotional trama it inflicts on the deceaseds' families.

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An owl turns to the other owl. He has to, he can't move his eyes.

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Q: What did Hellen Keller say to the pizza delivery man A: Stop raping me.

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, animals can't talk.

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my mom raped yerr foot

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roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

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Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

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A boat drowns in the middle of the water. Everyone dies except for an Asian guy. Why did he live? Because he could swim.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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