Charlie Sheen walks into a bar, he relapses.

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Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

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Whats worse than being raped? Being raped and murdered.

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Yo mama so fat!... we are very concerned for her health.

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MICHAEL

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Your mother is so fat that she has diabetes

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Q: What's the difference between a basket of tennis balls and a basket of dead baby heads? A: One is used for the sport of tennis the other is a basket of tennis balls!

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I have a crush on my dad.

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Hippopatomous!

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Your mom’s so dumb she forgot to update her WordPress installation and now she has pharmaceutical links all over her page.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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how do you annoy people? make statuses from anti-joke.com

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how big is a midgets dick? i dont know but probably bigger then mine

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What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

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Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

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K

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What do you call a drunk irishman? A cab.

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what r the two best ways to describe a guy whose eating a bannana while peeing, time conservative and a multitasker

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Why did the boy go to heaven? He was in an airplane.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

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What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

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What did the man say when he turned on his car? AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHH!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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