How did Bob fall off the swing? He had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? He had no arms. What did Bob get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

poo poo you you doo doo too too

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I little 3 year old girl said to her dog "You're my best friend in the whole world" AND THEN THE DOG DIED!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a man with no legs and arms hanging on your wall? Art

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What percentage of her brain does Sarah Palin use? 100%. That humans use only 10 or 30% of their brains is a myth.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What do you get when Justin Bieber gets his own tv show? A: suiside!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why do showers in Germany have 11 holes? Because a regular human on has 10 fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What does Free Candy and a Free game online have in common? They both have viruses

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the dog bark at the tall white man? Because the tall white man was in the process of attempting to rob the house in which said dog was situated. The dog was merely defending its patch.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

roses are red violets are blue however some roses are pink

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Charlie Sheen walks into a bar, he relapses.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats worse than being raped? Being raped and murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Yo mama so fat!... we are very concerned for her health.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

MICHAEL

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I have a crush on my dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A red house is red. A blue house is blue. What color is the green house? Clear they are made of glass.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your mother is so fat that she has diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops