Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, Everything's Grey, I am a Dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a black man who graduated med school? A doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walked into a bar. He ended up in the hospital being treated for a concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What is the different between a blonde and a rock? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why didn't the skeleton go to th party? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A boat drowns in the middle of the water. Everyone dies except for an Asian guy. Why did he live? Because he could swim.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the same between a plane a bird and a piece of celery? They all fly except the celery

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

thumb_up thumb_down +25

knock knock who's there GET IN THE VAN!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

You know what's never heard of? Father's Day in Camden.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I eat you and die of obesity due to high blood pressure and bad heart disease!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How many wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. They prefer digging burrows for hibernation.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Beauty is only skin deep Well of course it is, muscles, bones and tissues look disgusting.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

i'm on the sea food diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Dave: Say "game" ten times fast Bud: Game, game, game, game, gay ma, gay ma, I'm gay, I'm gay, I'm gay

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stappled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Guy: Im bisexual. Girl: Im thermosexual. Guy: ? Girl: Im only attracted to hot things. Which isnt you.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops