Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Simple poke her face.

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What's grey and looks good on policemen? your mom.

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How do you make a fat kid cry? You hold an onion up to their face.

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"Up to 50% off."

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Whats worse than 3 black guys. 4 black guys.

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How do you get a baby in a blender? Feet first so you can see the expression on it's face. How do you get it out ? Nacho chips!

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I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

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Knock knock What

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What does Santa get for Christmas? Chikungunya Fever.

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Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

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What do you call a guy who set's pancakes on fire? Mentally confused, and in need of a psychiatrist.

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a

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poo poo you you doo doo too too

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Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

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Where does piglet look for Pooh? The hundred acre forest, you creep.

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A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

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What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

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What is funnier than 9 black fellas dead in a trashbin? 1 black fella dead in 9 trashbins.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

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What did the skeleton say to the man? Nothing.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops