A Christian, a Jew and a Muslim fly in an airplane. They all reach safely to their destination and have a lovely vacation.

Why wouldn't the man in a wheelchair see out the window? The curtains were closed

There are two fish in a bathtub. One turns to the other and says "Could you please pass the soap?" The other one says "What do I look like to you, a typewriter?"

How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

What's the difference between a Ginger and a Brick? A ginger is a living organism.

Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

A black man and a jew both fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? the black man

How can you upset Helen Keller? In Braille spell out that she can't see or hear the hunger games

What do you call a pregnant 8-year old? A poor reflection on our society

How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her what her name is

roses are red violets are blue i dont give a damn how bout you

Why don't they sell aspirin in the jungle? Because it is not financially viable to sell pharmaceuticals in a largely unpopulated area.

Whats worse than a paper cut? AIDS.

What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

A man walked into a bar. It hurt.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

Ass

There was a man from the hood, His limericks weren't very good, So he decided to become a purveyor of monogrammed handkerchiefs and other fine linen products.

I went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog, it was a shitzu

Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange WHO? Knock knock? WHO'S THERE?! Orange Williams. Sorry, I suffer from debilitating OCD.

Why couldn't the man reach the police on his phone after his leg was hacked off by a serial killer? He had AT&T as a service provider.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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