What object do bananas look like? Bananas.

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they sent me too your moms house and 9 months later you are here

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. That would never happen because penguins would not be anywhere near a bath-tub at any point in their lives, I would be more concerned wondering why a penguin is in the US and calling animal control than making up a joke about it.

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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what did the white man say to the black man with the gun? Nothing he was dead

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Q. Why was the cat brown? A. because it was a maori

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how did the little girl die cancer

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What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? Fix it, call a repair man, call the landlord, do the dishes by hand or don't do them at all... your options are endless.

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Q: Why couldn't the hippopotamus get his driver's license? A: He didn't turn 16 yet.

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I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

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I smacked my crotch with the back end of a hammer. I got a free vasectomy.

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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fabien

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What did the man do when he walked into the gym? Died of a brain aneurysm.

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Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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Where is my tractor?

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why did little marwisheafuck want a cat for hanukock because her dad had ciilled a black priest that ate free mdicks out of a mshitfuck

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How does a black guy call to another black guy in Africa? using a telephone

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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How did Helen Keller meet her husband? On a blind date.

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What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

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How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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