What does KFC stand for? Kids Fattening Center

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What do you call a black man in the olympics? An olympian.

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why did the man scream? he stubbed his toe on a door

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What do you get when you cross a cantaloupe and a dog? "Melon-choly"

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What do you call a drunk irishman? A cab.

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What do you eat when you watch porn? Corn

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A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

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A married man, just realizes that his wife is cheating on him while he's away. But just to make sure, he goes into a spy shop to look for a camera to look in on his wife while he's not there. so he goes up to the shop keeper and asks " do you have any video camera's that record in on any place in a house?" the shop keeper says no and the man walks out of the store.

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Roses are red violets are blue whats the opposite of skiny again cause i think that's you

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Knock Knock... Who's there... .....................

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how do you annoy people? make statuses from anti-joke.com

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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Why did the Vietnemese prostitute ask for the phone? Because she wanted to use the phone.

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How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

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What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

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what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

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Why was the boy praying? Because both of his parents had just been brutally murdered in front of him and he was analy defiled by the assailant and left alive to have live with the pain of seeing both of his parents be killed. He had also dropped his lollipop.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

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Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

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A man walks into a zoo. There is only one animal, a dog. It's a shitzu.

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If it looks like chicken and tastes like chicken but Chuck Norris says it's beef, politely correct him. He is actually a very sensible fellow and will probably thank you for doing so.

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Make an effort in life whenever you want. Fight trough life when you got no other choice.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops