How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

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Do you need any assistance?

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What do millions of men give their girlfriends every Christmas? AIDS.

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

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What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

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Knock knock Whose there? Interrupting doctor Interr-- You have cancer.

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What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican guy walk into a bar. They are good interracial friends that like to put down some brewski's with eachother

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Nikii manaj is 99.9% fake on her body

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Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them they die.

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Hey, name is Anita, I am Nero`s nurse, he told me to say that if you wish to speak any further, you are going to have to call him and prove you are not some guy. Say Tifa, do you ever play videogames?

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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The Bible

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no

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If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

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When the clock strikes the bell at elephantasourous during my erectionn i screw myself CC

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

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why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

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What did the doctor say to the Jew? You have cancer.

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This is probably how President Obama proposed to his wife. "I don't wanna be Obama self"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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