THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

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Whats worse than getting knocked up? Finding out your Mother is a drugy living on the side of the road and your Dad is an acholic who diesnt care about you and realizes you might turn out the same way.

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knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

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What did the blind man say to the librarian? Hello, I am looking for books that are published in braille.

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Ha

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Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

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Why did the runner stop farting in the middle of his run? He ran out of gas.

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What's worse than eating an apple with aids? Loosing your virginity to the seven chosen ones.

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b

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What did the Catholic Priest do to the 9-year-old boy? He ate him. The priest was actually Jeffery Dahmer.

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What do you call an amazing, funny, beautiful, nice, goreous, stunning girl? Adena Gabrysiak <3

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

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What's grey and looks good on policemen? your mom.

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Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

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What do you call bad anti-jokes? Suckish comedy What do you call suckish comedy? Bad anti-jokes

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What is black and white and red all over the news paper of someone with tuberculosis

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Nice weather we're having.

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Vagina-Boob

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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I'm going to Re-write History... History

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What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

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How do you make a baby cry? Hit it with a brick.

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Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

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roses are red, violets are red, my garden is on fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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