What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

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I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

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Knock knock What

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Don't go to the last anti-joke page, they're all terrible or repeated I hope this isn't one of them

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What do you call a guy who set's pancakes on fire? Mentally confused, and in need of a psychiatrist.

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Knock knock Whose there? Interrupting doctor Interr-- You have cancer.

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di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

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What's funnier than somebody spitting in someone else's food? It's not even funny, it's just plain rude and disgusting.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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There once was a man in Peru, Who dreamt he was eating his shoe. He was promptly taken to the hospital but died from infection.

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What is funnier than 9 black fellas dead in a trashbin? 1 black fella dead in 9 trashbins.

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What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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Where does piglet look for Pooh? The hundred acre forest, you creep.

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How its supposed to go: Knock knock Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mopwho? How my friend Cassidy did it: Knock knock Who's there? I eat my poo! Oh wait I screwed up.

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Why did the dog bark at the tall white man? Because the tall white man was in the process of attempting to rob the house in which said dog was situated. The dog was merely defending its patch.

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What do you call an alligator in a vest? An amphibious mammal wearing clothes. Why would you ask me that.

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Why did Sally drink water? Because she wanted to take pills and kill herself.

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A woman went out and had a great time with her friends. Then she walked home alone and got viciously raped by 4 large black men.

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what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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