I can't hear music. I am a sentence.

how much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood three wood

What do you call a black man who is poor, homeless, and HIV positive? Unlucky.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting cancer from a horse.

Funny joke to play on an elderly woman: Take her cane and push her In front of a bus.

Knock Knock Who's there? No one was there. It was two birds flew into the door and died.

Have you seen the Hobbit? Yes they're taking him to Isengard

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

What's black and white and read all over? A zebra family that was just murdered by African poachers.

What do you call a black airman? A pilot!

What did the young boy get His dad for fathers day? Nothing, his dad died from a very aggresive cancer

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Several occupants leave as they realise the danger of the large animal.

What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

What do Ethiopian children do at night? Starve

And then the devil said "Let there be Justin beiber"

What's the difference between a Corvette and a sack of dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

what do you call a girl with no arms and legs whatever her name is

What did the one legged girl do when her apartment caught on fire? She tried to hop to safety, but died of smoke inhalation.

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

How many blind people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Does it matter?

Why did the Mexican cross the road? The light was green.

An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

Youve got to spell the name right you dead dylan fuck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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