What did the boy Tell to his friends? Nothing. He has noone.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

Q:How many prostitutes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two

thumb_up thumb_down -88

Why are all black people fast? They aren't. Some of them are slow.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Q: What would you do for a Klondike bar? A: I would make the slightly onerous journey to the local grocery establishment and pay my hard-earned money to procure a dessert which I quite enjoy.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how do you know a chinese person has been in your house? #1 your homework is done #2 your computer is upgraded #3 when you get home there still pulling out of your driveway

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What would Billy Mays do if he were alive today? Yell.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Your momma so fat she's fat

thumb_up thumb_down -49

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? Lick his dog's penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A horse walks into a bar... it was accompanied by a blind man for it was a seeing eye pony and the bartender who was not tolerant to blind people turned away the man causing him to recieve dirty glances from the kindly patrons of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Why was the swing in the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

thumb_up thumb_down -88

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

thumb_up thumb_down -96

Chuck Norris watches TV.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the boy drop his ice cream. He never got an ice cream he is alergic.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

If life gives you lemons, you can't really make anything because you lack the proper materials.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock. Knock. Who's There? Its Jim, is Craig home? No he moved out sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

a Squirrl climded a tree to get a nut

thumb_up thumb_down -47

y momma so fat that she's heavy

thumb_up thumb_down -51

What's brown and sticky? Poop

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Q)Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl go to the toilet? A)Because the P is silent.

thumb_up thumb_down -83

A black man owns his own night club. He tells the white man to look out for his night club. The white man bangs his head. The black man says, I told you to look out, you have now bumped into my big club that I take out at night time.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops