What did Chuck Norris say to the boy? Sure I'll sign your t-shirt!

What's worse than losing your phone? Getting raped anal until phones fall out

What did Jesus say to his disciples at the Last Supper? Go to Hell.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

A pregnant woman goes to the hospital to deliver a baby. It is born perfectly normal and healthy, the doctor looks at the mother and father offering them congratulations as he hands them a 9 lb 10 oz baby boy. The mother wanted a girl, but she instead develops post part em depression. She goes through years of psychotherapy to again become well adjusted, her second child is a girl.

Darude - Sandstorm

biggest lie in the world. I love you grandma.

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Why was the swing in the kitchen?

Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

whats cheese thats not yours? the one in the toilet.

A man goes to a Korean-owned dry cleaner to pick up his suits. They were impeccably cleaned at a reasonable rate.

Want to hear the best joke ever? Me too.

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

What do you call it when 1 person has an imaginary friend? A mental disorder. What do you call it when 1 billion people have an imaginary friend? A Religion.

roses are red violets are blue i've got a boner and it raging for you

Oh hot damn, this is my jam. Strawberry, to be specific.

A boy eats 3 pounds of candy, 2 whole pizzas, and drinks 10 beers. Why did he puke? Someone came out of nowhere, and kicked him in the nuts

a horse walks into a bar except it wasn't a horse it was Sarah Jessica Parker

y momma so fat that she's heavy

ok i'm typing, so how does this work?

Q:How many prostitutes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two

The Holocaust.

Why did the group of black men not get paid for all of their manual labor? It was the early 1800's.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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