math test 2=2

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How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

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A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

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What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

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Why was the guy on top of the van It was his funeral

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What did the white guy say to the black guy wearing a black T-shirt? That's a very nice shirt.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Barrack Obama shops at Baby Gap

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Why did Sally Drop here ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock Knock? *who's there* Not Sally.

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Two women were sitting quietly.

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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Potato.

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

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What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

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Q) what do girls like long , soft (can go hard) and has white stuff come out A) Twinkies but if left out of its plastic wrapping for a long period of time it will go hard

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

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get on your knees and make a donut face:)

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Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

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What's the difference between Kim kardashian and lebrOn James?? Kim got a ring this year

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

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Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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