Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

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Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

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Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

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Why couldn't Simon run? Because he had Cerebral Palsy.

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Why was the guy on top of the van It was his funeral

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Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

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what did the banana say to the apple i dont know because bananas dont talk

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96

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What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

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How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

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Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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Agricultural production fell significantly.

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What would Michael Jackson do if he saw a naked child alone in an alleyway? It is unknown, as he cannot be asked about this hypothetical scenario due to his passing in 2009.

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What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

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What's dead? Your mum.

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That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

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if a kayak was stuck in a tree with its headlights on, how many pancakes stacked will it take to get to the moon? none because snakes dont have armpits

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Why did the man throw his watch out the window? Because it was broken.

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Shortest Joke in the World? Well, just look down.

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What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

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a korean guy robs a black guys convenient store!

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What is green and red and spins around? A frog in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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