Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

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Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

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What can a bench do, that a south African man cant? Support a family. (I HOPE THAT WASN'T RACIST)

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A black man walks into a bar. The man behind him ducks.

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A black man and a jew both fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? the black man

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Why wasn't the child swimming? It drowned

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What's the difference between a rooster and a waffle iron? A lot.

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Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

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Knock, Knock... Who's there An abandoned baby

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THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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Why did Mary fail to consume her breakfatst? Because Suzy has a history of bi-polar disorder as well as anorexia.

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Yo momma is so average, she has to maintain her own facebook account...

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What did the Leah say to the Pawneez? AWWWW YEAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

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Ha

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Q:What did the robot say to the boy? A:Nothing the robot malfunctioned and started choking the boy, despite the towns best efforts they could not release the death grip on the boys throat, after the robot was done choking the boy it exploded killing 99% of the population in a 5 mile radius.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a fox stapled to his face.

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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How do you make a baby cry? Hit it with a brick.

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why did Suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock? whos there not Suzie

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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