- Anti Joke

This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in a village atop a hill. Citizens were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from the age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest. Fear in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He said to himself, there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's Magical Basement. Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonny's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a carton of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took the carton of Ribena, crumpled it up, spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

There was a seal and polar bear on the same iceberg. The polar bear turns to the seal and says "Roar!!" Then the polar bear ate the seal.

Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, they're just out of bad taste.

I used to be an adventurer like you. Then i took an arrow to the knee.

What did the prisoner say to the man who posted his bail? Thank you.

I little 3 year old girl said to her dog "You're my best friend in the whole world" AND THEN THE DOG DIED!

A red house is red. A blue house is blue. What color is the green house? Clear they are made of glass.

how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

Q: how do u piss off a plumber? A: kill his whole family

a man walked up to me and said someone is dying with long terminal cancer i said who? man replies your cat. i replied i don't have a cat. man says whoops wrong person

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

What is the difference between dead babies and a corvette? There is no corvette in my garage

Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

How come George hit his face when he fell? He had no arms.

Waiter, waiter! There's a fly in my soup! Apologies for the inconvenience sir, I shall bring you a new bowl as soon as possible.

-3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Women's rights...

What did timothy say after he went to go golf? - I just went golfing

What did the dog say to the dildo? Your rubber

That moment when you touch your balls then sniff your fingers and realize it smells good.

There was a seal and polar bear on the same iceberg. The polar bear turns to the seal and says "Roar!!" Then the polar bear ate the seal.

Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, they're just out of bad taste.

I used to be an adventurer like you. Then i took an arrow to the knee.

What did the prisoner say to the man who posted his bail? Thank you.

I little 3 year old girl said to her dog "You're my best friend in the whole world" AND THEN THE DOG DIED!

A red house is red. A blue house is blue. What color is the green house? Clear they are made of glass.

how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

Q: how do u piss off a plumber? A: kill his whole family

a man walked up to me and said someone is dying with long terminal cancer i said who? man replies your cat. i replied i don't have a cat. man says whoops wrong person

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

What is the difference between dead babies and a corvette? There is no corvette in my garage

Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

Women's Rights

How come George hit his face when he fell? He had no arms.

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

Why did the black man rob the bank? Well..why not?

No it isn't.

Waiter, waiter! There's a fly in my soup! Apologies for the inconvenience sir, I shall bring you a new bowl as soon as possible.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??