Knock Knock. Who's there? Nancy Nancy who? Nancy.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Whats worse than a paper cut? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why couldn't the man reach the police on his phone after his leg was hacked off by a serial killer? He had AT&T as a service provider.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why don't they sell aspirin in the jungle? Because it is not financially viable to sell pharmaceuticals in a largely unpopulated area.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff. whats blue and fluffy? pink fluff holding its breath.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Yo momma is so average, she has to maintain her own facebook account...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why do black people call white people "Niggas"? Because they took an overdose of KFC and watermelon, they're actually just insulting themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What can a bench do, that a south African man cant? Support a family. (I HOPE THAT WASN'T RACIST)

thumb_up thumb_down +19

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

whats yellow sticky and smelly? I dont know i was asking you

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why are black people faster than white people? They are descended from a lineage where athleticism was more greatly selected for in the evolutionary process.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

whats dirtier than lady gaga's penis in justin bieber's vagina? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

the jokes are repetitive on this site

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the hooker get for christmas? Herpes

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops