What did the blind and deaf woman get for her birthday? Raped.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

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Q. If you have $5, and a friend has $5, then how much money do you both have? A. You both have $5.

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What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

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who has no significant other or personal life? who ever is on anti-joke.com

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How do you make a bllind person cry? Slowly cut off their toes.

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Why did the little boy drop his Ice cream? He had no arms(:

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why was the old woman angry? fig pudding.

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What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

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What do you call Santa's helpers? Chinese factory workers, who live in impoverished conditions, work up to 16 hours a day, earning slave wages. God damn you, Steve Jobs and Mattel.

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children driving off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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Your mom is so fat, you might be dyslexic

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Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.

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Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

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Knock Knock Who's There Gary Oh hi Gary, come in

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math test 2=2

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What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

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How do you know a man is Jewish? Because he told you or you met him in a synagogue.

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How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

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say iphone 5 times then look under your pillow ...nothings there

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Women's Sports

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What's another name for a black priest? An African American Priest.

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What do you call: A black person, A white person, A mexican, A Jew, And an athiest? Whatever their names are!

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What did one wall say to the other? Walls don't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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