Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? All over. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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I raped someone in my basement... ...Just Kidding!... ...I dont have a basement

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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whats better than 24................. 25

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Why cant Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish.

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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A fish swims up stream for his anual spawning season The fish dies from a heart attack because of the rigorous that took place.

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What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Whats worse than being hit by a bus and dying? Being hit by a bus and listening to Justin Beiber in a hospital bed.

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did u hear about evan porter going out with his computer of course not because u haven't read this joke yet

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown, how mad would you be if i ate your golfish? Very angry, as my goldfish is not food.

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One muffin doesn't say anything to another muffin while baking in an oven because they lack the organs necessary to attain properties of speech and thought

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What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

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A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

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What do you do when you need shade? CALL RAYSEAN

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THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

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A bear walks into a bar. Four people were taken to the hospital and there was one fatality.

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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If a plane crashes on the border of America and Canada, where do you bury the survivors? Somewhere discreet where no one will find them

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf.

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A chicken met a chicken, And they were chickens two, Two chickens met two chickens, And they were chickens too. Four chickens met a boiling pot And they were chicken stew.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

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A black man boards a plane. He enjoys the rest of the flight in first class.

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What is the best school in Victoria? Lyndale.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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