Q: What is a duck's favorite thing to smoke? A: Quack

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What did the boy do when he got locked out his house go on anti joke and make a stupid joke about him being locked out

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You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

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why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

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A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

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How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

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What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

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if a kayak was stuck in a tree with its headlights on, how many pancakes stacked will it take to get to the moon? none because snakes dont have armpits

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Why did the child step on a ball?

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What did the kid say when you gave him a cookie? Thank you.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because it was a rather hot day and his attention was momentarily directed towards something else.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a chevrolet? I've never been inside a chevrolet before...

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Why did the child die? Natural causes.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

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Why was the blonde crying? Because she just watched her infant get sucked into a jet engine and she was very sad.

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ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Everybody leaves except Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson never walked out alive

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Why didn't the pharmacist set up his business in the jungle? Because setting up a pharmacy in the jungle is not a viable business option.

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What's the best position to be in while being attacked by a bear? invisible

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What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney loves you.

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Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

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If there are 500 bricks in an airplane and one falls out how many are there in he plane? 499. Name 3 steps to get a Elephant in a fridge. 1. Open the fridge 2. Put the Elephant in the fridge 3. Close the fridge Name 4 steps to get an Deer in a fridge. 1. Open the fridge 2.Take the Elephant out of the fridge 3. Put the Deer in the fridge 4. Close the fridge The Lion King is having a birthday party. Every animal came, besides one. Who was it? The Deer. Because hes trapped in the Fridge. The Deer manages to escape the fridge, and hes running late. he encounters Crocodile lake. How will he cross it? He will swim through it because the Crocodiles are at the Lion Kings birthday. Then suddenly, The Deer dies. How? The Brick hit him.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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