Did you hear about the man who didn't get a burger with his meal?! Yes he is doing quite well on his diet don't you agree?

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Nipples+poop= good stuff. Hellllll yeaaahhhh

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Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Becasue she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Your mother is so fat that she has diabetes

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch." It was an Iron bar.

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What do you eat when you watch porn? Corn

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What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

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How do magnets work?

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What did the scientist have to say about religion when he was asked by a local reporter? He said that it is a cultural system that creates powerful and long-lasting meaning, by establishing symbols that relate humanity to truths and values.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

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I'll give you a nickel to lick my pickle, a dime to take your time and a quarter if I can f*ck you in the ass

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Six million.

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How do you kill somebody instantly? Make them smell Smelly mcD's socks.

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Roses are red violets are blue whats the opposite of skiny again cause i think that's you

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Why can't woman be cokcy? Because that don't have one (Sorry for the sexist joke, to who it may concern)

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What's easier to get than a broke hooker on the side of the street? Osama Bin Laden.

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Knock Knock Come in

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well neither has he.

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have you ever noticed that when geese are flying in a V, that one side is longer? Do you know why? no...why? There is more on one side

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If it looks like chicken and tastes like chicken but Chuck Norris says it's beef, politely correct him. He is actually a very sensible fellow and will probably thank you for doing so.

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How do you get all the apples off of an apple tree? You pick them

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A man sees his friend and asks jokingly, "Hey is that ketchup or blood on your face?" The friend replies, "No, I ate your family," and shoots the man in the head with a rifle.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worse than that? Dying. What's worse than dying? Finding three worms in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops