What do you call a muslim? A terrorist

A black man walks into a bar. The man behind him ducks.

Jacob Black and Edward Cullen show up at your house. You tell your best girl friend and she has you admitted to a psych ward because everyone knows they are fictional characters!

If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

What can a bench do, that a south African man cant? Support a family. (I HOPE THAT WASN'T RACIST)

Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

What is funnier than a barrel full of clowns? The holocaust.

Why did the fat prick post on the internet? Because he was MorningAfterBoy

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What is small, black, and loved by children? An oreo.

Why did the orange drive the tractor? Because he always wanted to go to the moon.

whats dirtier than lady gaga's penis in justin bieber's vagina? nothing.

Q:what do you call a black guy with a gun A:racial equality in our nations armed forces

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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What is the difference between an Irishman and a plank of wood? Almost everything, including anatomy, chemical make up, mass etc

What's bigger than the Loch Ness Monster? Loch Ness.

Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

whats funnier than drews nose .... ??

Why did Mary fail to consume her breakfatst? Because Suzy has a history of bi-polar disorder as well as anorexia.

Knock, Knock Who's there? A robber who will most likely kill you along with anyone else who will ruin their chances of becoming more wealthy off your most prized possessions.

How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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