Whats the difference between a car and a dead child? I don't have a dead baby in my basement.

A Jew, homosexual and Irishman walk into a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community.

What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

Guy: Im bisexual. Girl: Im thermosexual. Guy: ? Girl: Im only attracted to hot things. Which isnt you.

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Did you hear about the elderly bank robber? Me neither.

Do you know whats not funny black jokes that arent racist. You belendo!!!

Albert and Hunter, Forever in love < 3

why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

One muffin doesn't say anything to another muffin while baking in an oven because they lack the organs necessary to attain properties of speech and thought

What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

A Nazi and a Communist walk into a bar. 10 million Slavs die.

What did the blind man say to the librarian? Hello, I am looking for books that are published in braille.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue. The pen is blue. THE GOD DAMN PEN IS BLUE!!!!

Roses are grey, Violets are grey. I'm colour blind, It's a very depressing situation.

Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

What do you get when Chuck Norris meets Chuck Norris? A bad joke.

An Irish man willingly walks out of a bar

A Mexican walks into an all white people bar. He then proceeds to buy rounds for everyone in the bar. Everyone thanks the mexican and everyone gets back to doing their own thing.

*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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