Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't like anyone who is not a straight, white male.

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A guy hit his elbow. Judaism.

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Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shot in the face by a shotgun that shoots fireworks that explodes into chainsaw bullets.

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they sent me too your moms house and 9 months later you are here

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. That would never happen because penguins would not be anywhere near a bath-tub at any point in their lives, I would be more concerned wondering why a penguin is in the US and calling animal control than making up a joke about it.

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Justin Beiber and a speaker = no hearing within a 25 mile area

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Yo mama so fat, she most likely wont live to 40

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Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

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Why did bob die Cause he got hit by a mailbox

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why did little marwisheafuck want a cat for hanukock because her dad had ciilled a black priest that ate free mdicks out of a mshitfuck

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? One is alive meanwhile the other is an object full of solid waste.

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According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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Halo < COD

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

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How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

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Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

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Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

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Friend: I hope you burn in hell -.- Me: I hope you step on a leggo in the dark Friend: *gasp* take that back

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The Treatment of Steve Bartman

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

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knock knock go away ok

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How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Popsicle!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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