knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nevermind.

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

Can you see this brett? Connor

How do you make a homeless man cry? you throw away his trash.

what do you call a black man named mike

What did the guy who walked into a bar say? Ouch

THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

Whats worse than getting knocked up? Finding out your Mother is a drugy living on the side of the road and your Dad is an acholic who diesnt care about you and realizes you might turn out the same way.

What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

Chuck Norris.

Matty B

alert("The Game");//

A- Knock Knock B- Who's there? A- Soccer!

Women's rights...

Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

why did Suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock? whos there not Suzie

Two guys walk into a bar, they are both alchoholics and beat their wives.

roses are red, violets are red, my garden is on fire

What happened on December 7, 1941 in Hawaii? People celebrated the 100th anniversary of December 7, 1841

If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

What do you get when you cross a zombie with a beer? Nothing because zombies are just another subject dealing with the occult.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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