What do you call a drunk cannibalistic Jew? A HeBrew!

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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A hippie gets on a bus and greets the bus driver in a nice fashion Once the bus stops at his bus stop he thanks the bus driver and gets off the bus

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. That would never happen because penguins would not be anywhere near a bath-tub at any point in their lives, I would be more concerned wondering why a penguin is in the US and calling animal control than making up a joke about it.

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A black man walks into a bar and see's a mexican bartender. He orders some vodka.

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What do we want? Chips!! When do we want them? Chips

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Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

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Q. Why was the cat brown? A. because it was a maori

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What did the elephant say to the goldfish? Nothing. Animals are unable to speak and fish aren't able to live on land

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who has no significant other or personal life? who ever is on anti-joke.com

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Gracias por depositar mi dinero, y tener un buen día, adios.

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I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

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What did Santa do on Christmas? NOTHING HES NOT REAL!

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wanna hear a good joke? neither do I

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roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

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What do you call a pig sizzling in a pan? BACON!

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What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

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Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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How did Danny break his bike? No one really knows. The best probable guess who be a tree fell on it, because Danny and his bike were found under a fallen tree.

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what do babies and prostitutes have in common they will both cry if you hit them with a brick

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baby loves lalma

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How does a black guy call to another black guy in Africa? using a telephone

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Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

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What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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