What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

What's green and goes 100 miles an hour? a green racing car

Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

i dislike sack in my mouth

Knock Knock. Come in.

Why did the monkey follow the tree? Because it was dead.

your mamma so fat she is homosexual... hahaha to bad u will get last in her

I smacked my crotch with the back end of a hammer. I got a free vasectomy.

whats harder than watching a dog get hit by a bus? my boner..

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded

How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? What?

Canada

What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

What's better than getting to sleep in? Sex for the very first time.

you know what hurts.... PAIN

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

What did the Polar Bear say when he slid off the iceberg? Radio

What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

There's no "i" in tim.

Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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