Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

You are driving a bus. At the first stop, 12 people get on and 7 get off At the second stop, 13 people get on and 11 get off At the third stop, 7 people get off the bus. You turn the bus off get out and go home.

A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

without laughing try to say " i hate bubble" with a dull face

Where was Susie when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

Why was the black man escorted out of the bar. He was 10

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing finding a worm in an apple is disgusting because worms are disgusting creature that shouldn't live in an apple

Why do white people despise black people? Because they are good at everything we suck at.

I'm so hungry I feel I would be able to ingest large quantities of food.

Bin Laden comes out of a cave

imagine a world without santa ill make it easy, lookout the window

knock knock

stop it ryan vallee

What is the diffrence between a guy and pie? The pie taste like fruit somethimes

What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney loves you.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

People are like cats, they both die when they're suffocated

Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

don't look behind you

Whats worse than 3 black guys. 4 black guys.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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