A fish swims up stream for his anual spawning season The fish dies from a heart attack because of the rigorous that took place.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

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why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

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What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

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Whats worse than getting knocked up? Finding out your Mother is a drugy living on the side of the road and your Dad is an acholic who diesnt care about you and realizes you might turn out the same way.

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What is small, black, and loved by children? An oreo.

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Why did Timmy stop running? He got hit by a bus

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why did Suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock? whos there not Suzie

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What's worse than eating an apple with aids? Loosing your virginity to the seven chosen ones.

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Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

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Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

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What do millions of men give their girlfriends every Christmas? AIDS.

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What did the hooker get for christmas? Herpes

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

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What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

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What is black and white and red all over the news paper of someone with tuberculosis

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Jared Gough is a slut

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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"Up to 50% off."

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guess what chicken butt

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

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Why did Mary fall of the tire swing? Because she's a dumbass

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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