Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

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why did the chicken cross the street? it didn't.

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A man sees his friend and asks jokingly, "Hey is that ketchup or blood on your face?" The friend replies, "No, I ate your family," and shoots the man in the head with a rifle.

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Canida

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A man walks into a bar. He hit his head so hard that he went into a coma.

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i went through your mum like a plane on 9,11

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Whats worst than getting screwed. Your mother

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Why do Christians believe in God? Because he is real.

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A: Knock! Knock! B: Who's there? A: Kitchen B: Kitchen who? A: GET THERE!

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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An abortionist secretly fancies himself pro life, with reservations. Overwhelmed, and utterly fed up, with the burden of carrying on the family business, he aborts himself. Although he was only 46, his frail mother was nevertheless proud of his decision to succeed where she had failed 46 years ealier.

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When Life gives you lemons... Squeeze the juice right back into Life's eyes!

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What's blue and smells like yellow paint? Blue paint.

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What did the pedophile say to the little girl? "I have a condition and I think it would be healthy for both of us if you stayed within the supervision of your parents"

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What happens when Brittany Spears is hungry? She goes to taco bell for food

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keep your eye off me if you dont look at me, how do you know i looked at you? there is a mirror

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a poodle? A satisfied elephant and a dead poodle.

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What did the blonde do when she missed bus 40? She waited 30 minutes for it to come back around again.

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A Canadian man, American man and French man all go to a wive swapping party. The Canadian gets the American's wife, the American gets the French wife, and the Frenchman dies of a brain aneurism and the Canadian wife is very disappointed in her night.

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Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

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What do you call 2 tigers, a zebra, and a walrus? A small zoo full of 4 animals

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look left ------------------------------------------------------> i bet you failed.

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Whats big, ugly, and sucks? Death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops