What do you get when you cross a cat with a giraffe? A genetically unstable animal that dies shortly after birth.

Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Your momma so fat she's fat

Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

there was a blond, a brunette, and a redhead at the edge of a cliff The blond being stupid jumped off the cliff and broke every bone in her body

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first one.

Want to hear the best joke ever? Me too.

Why did the all the fish in the lake die? A pesticide bioaccumulated through the food chain.

Yo mamma's so black, and that's ok. We're all different and unique.

Q: What would you do for a Klondike bar? A: I would make the slightly onerous journey to the local grocery establishment and pay my hard-earned money to procure a dessert which I quite enjoy.

yo mamas so ugly she turned madoosa into stone

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

what did the therapist say to the other therapist? were both therapists.

What's the difference between a black guy and a Cadillac? One is a car and the other is a man. And it is insensitive to speak about race so blatantly, sir.

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman went in a hot air balloon and had a magical afternoon that none of them will ever forget, except the Scotsman because he fell out during take off and is now in a coma.

Why was Jesus able to walk on water? Because he was the son of God and therefore devine, he can do whatever he pleases

Knock knock Whos there? ... You got ding dong ditched

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

I am Skaldak!

A horse walks into a bar... it was accompanied by a blind man for it was a seeing eye pony and the bartender who was not tolerant to blind people turned away the man causing him to recieve dirty glances from the kindly patrons of the bar.

What do you call a dead cat on the side of the road? Kitty litter

What's worse than losing your phone? Getting raped anal until phones fall out

Oh hot damn, this is my jam. Strawberry, to be specific.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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