My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

Why did your mum have sex with my mum? Because they're lesbian.

What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

Two rabbits are being chased by dogs and hide in a log in the forest. The male pushes the female to the dogs which are at both sides of the log and gets off Scott free.

a dyslexic Satan worshiper sold his soul to Santa

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? To end her misery.

What's worse than dropping your sandwich. Dying of pancreatic cancer.

How did Ronald McDonald die? He was hit by a big mac

Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

Why did LeBron James up and bail on Cleveland? He thought there was a greater opportunity for postseason success by playing in Miami.

How do you starve a black family? Hide there government assistance card under their work boots!

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

You know what is better than winning a race in the Special Olympics? Winning two races.

What's worse than locking your keys in ur at outside of an abortion clinic? Going in side and asking for a coat hanger!!

What does KFC stand for? Kids Fattening Center

Ryan Chang is funny.

Why did Sally drink water? Because she wanted to take pills and kill herself.

Did you hear about the man who didn't get a burger with his meal?! Yes he is doing quite well on his diet don't you agree?

How do you kill somebody instantly? Make them smell Smelly mcD's socks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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