What is black and white and red all over the news paper of someone with tuberculosis

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I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

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What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

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what do u call a gay bird a gaybird

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Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

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A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

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What's the difference between a computer and a television?

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

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Why doesn't Bella like airplanes? Because her family crashed in one....

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Why did the tree cross the road? A woman crashed into it.

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Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

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whats wrong with 4 blackmen in a jaguar falling over a cliff?? That was my car...

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what did the ugly girl get on valentines? A paper bag

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I saw a Chinese guy and a black guy talking to each other today, it gave me hope... For another rush hour movie

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your a towel.

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What is the difference between dead babies and a corvette? There is no corvette in my garage

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Knock knock SCREW YOU I BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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A man walks into a bar... and recieves a concusion and short-term memory loss

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What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

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If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

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Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

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what was sad about six black guys driving off a cliff in a cadallac? They were my friends

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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