An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

What did the Englishman say to the Irishman? "I am from England"

Why is john unable to ride a bike? because john is a rock

What rhymes with turtle? Rape

why did Suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock? whos there not Suzie

What did the Catholic Priest do to the 9-year-old boy? He ate him. The priest was actually Jeffery Dahmer.

Why was the puppy sad? It was burning alive

So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

What do you get when you cross corn with more corn? A devestating force that will make you live on a rowboat and perform demeaning puppet shows you will not Even enyoy!!!!

Want to hear a tough toung twister? spoons

ugh good riddance

what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

People tell me im insane. Its all a conspiracy.

What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

Why doesn't Bella like airplanes? Because her family crashed in one....

Why do blondes like cheez whiz? Because it tastes good

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he was angry and frustrated with the people in his life, and the ringing clock was the first thing he noticed in his depressed rage.

Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

A Psychologist said that I am a pessimist... Figures.

Why? Because!

A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

Where did little Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere

tänk om jag inte vill läga upp en ny

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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