So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

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What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

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What did the Englishman say to the Irishman? "I am from England"

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Womens Rights.

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What did the blind man say to the librarian? Hello, I am looking for books that are published in braille.

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On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

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A woman leaves the kitchen.

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heres a great game to play... DEATH TO BABIES!

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Oprah is black and the richest women in the world!!!

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feces

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Whats worse than being hit by a bus and dying? Being hit by a bus and listening to Justin Beiber in a hospital bed.

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What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

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What does an Asian man, Black man, & a Hick all have in common with automatic weapons? The Asian is Vietnamese and fought in the Nam, The Black guy lives in the ghetto and was shot in a drive by, and the hick and his best friend got drunk and shot each other in the foot.

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Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

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Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

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Do you need any assistance?

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Nikii manaj is 99.9% fake on her body

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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Why was the black man hanged? He was charged with piracy in the 1500s..

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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where did Bob go during the bombing attacks? All over the walls.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops