Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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What does Free Candy and a Free game online have in common? They both have viruses

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What is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

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The 19th Amendment

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Knock knock SCREW YOU I BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What looks like a jew, smells like a jew, but claims he isn't jewish? Fletcher Phillips

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Nipples+poop= good stuff. Hellllll yeaaahhhh

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how did the turtle die? it drowned itself

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Why couldn't sally drive her car? Because sally is a girl.

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What do you call a Mexican from Cancun? A cholo.

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What did the boy say 2+2 was? 4

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You know what they say about men with large feet? Large shoes.

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Knock Knock... Who's there... .....................

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WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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Whats fat, brown and on the ground? A chubby indian kid

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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a man pulled up to a girl in a white van with tinted windows. he told the girl he had candy inside. she got in the van. he then proceeded to rape becasue he was a rapist and that is the lifestyle he choose to have.

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How did the fat man die? Type 2 diabetes

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What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

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Q: What do you call a Mexican who gets his car stolen. A: Pablo

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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A man sees his friend and asks jokingly, "Hey is that ketchup or blood on your face?" The friend replies, "No, I ate your family," and shoots the man in the head with a rifle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops