What happened to the alligator who waled into a bar? He was killed and skinned by swamp hunters in Louisiana.

What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

Why did the cookie go to the docter? Because he was dieing of terminal cancer.

What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

When is a bus not a bus? When it explodes.

Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

Cows go moo.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

Women's rights

Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

What disease did the gay man get from his partner? Streptococcus!

A boat drowns in the middle of the water. Everyone dies except for an Asian guy. Why did he live? Because he could swim.

What's better than winning gold at the special Olympics? Not being retarded. - Blake Woodman

Knock Knock. Come in.

roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

yo mama is so fat that they call her fat mama

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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