Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

So a disabled man walks into a bar...

What did the black kid call the white kid? His name...

What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are walking down the street when they find a genie. They run away in fear because finding a genie out of nowhere is kinda freaky.

what is 6.9? a good thing ruined by a period

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

this anti joke will likely be the most liked one out of all the anti jokes.

A woman leaves the kitchen.

*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nevermind.

What did the Englishman say to the Irishman? "I am from England"

Womens Rights.

di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

How do you put 100 babys in a bucket? A blender

Whats worse than getting knocked up? Finding out your Mother is a drugy living on the side of the road and your Dad is an acholic who diesnt care about you and realizes you might turn out the same way.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing...he found it.

why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

How did bob Marley quit doing Drugs?

Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

The only hand that can beat a royal flush is Chuck Norris's hand

Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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