An Irish man willingly walks out of a bar

what did the cheese say to the wall? nothing cheese can't talk.

The only hand that can beat a royal flush is Chuck Norris's hand

Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

Whats worse than the holocaust??having a downstndrome for a child

Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

"Up to 50% off."

What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

What's funnier than somebody spitting in someone else's food? It's not even funny, it's just plain rude and disgusting.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

Why do blondes like cheez whiz? Because it tastes good

Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

what do u call a gay bird a gaybird

Why was the jewish girl happy? Her pussy was wet!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new home? No. Neither has he....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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