How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't, because feminists can never change anything!

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whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

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a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

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a catholic priest and a young boy

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How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

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A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

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How did the guy in a wheelchair get up 7 flights of stairs? He didn't.

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Why couldn't the man reach the police on his phone after his leg was hacked off by a serial killer? He had AT&T as a service provider.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no legs. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because its not suppost to be in the tree. Why did susy fall off her bike? Because she was hit by 2 monkeys and a refrigerator!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nancy Nancy who? Nancy.

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What's the difference between a rooster and a waffle iron? A lot.

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what did one mexican say to the other Hi.

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Chuck Norris will die sometime in the future.

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Someone listens to an anti joke. They laugh.

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A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

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Whats worse than being hit by a bus and dying? Being hit by a bus and listening to Justin Beiber in a hospital bed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? KFC was closed.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff. whats blue and fluffy? pink fluff holding its breath.

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as i unscrewed my belly button and suddenly my butt fell off

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Why did the man have no head? He did it was under his shirt

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What do you call a helicopter above Hawaii? A helicopter.

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A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

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Knock knock Who's there Ummmm....me u r looking right at me O yeah Ummm... Now what U knocked? No. O Ye Ok Alright cya

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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