A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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A man walks into a bar... and recieves a concusion and short-term memory loss

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The World Record For Longest Game of Hide and Seek goes to... Binladin

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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And I want you like Anne Frank wanted ... nobody to read her diary. Cuz, like a diary is a collection of secret things that no one else reads, that's the whole point of a diary. Millions of people have breached this little girl's privacy after she was chased by Nazis. Kick her while she's down.

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Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

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You know what is better than winning a race in the Special Olympics? Winning two races.

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Women

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Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

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what did the scientist say in Siberia? burrrrrrrrrrilium

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Sonic

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A man got a promotion at work. Now he makes more money.

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

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Knock Knock Come in

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Why did the cow have to travel everywhere by an electric scooter? It had motor neurone disease.

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Why did the man drink the milk? Because he was a baby.

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

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A: Knock, Knock! B: Who's there? A: Boo B: Boo, who? A: Don't cry, it's only me!

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Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor. The results came back, and you have brain cancer.

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Why did the Vietnemese prostitute ask for the phone? Because she wanted to use the phone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops