an amosh person used an electrical appliance

What's worse than finding mold on your cheese? Getting Raped

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

People are like cats, they both die when they're suffocated

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

don't look behind you

Your mom is so old so will die soon.

How did the bald lady die? Of cancer

What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

yo mamas so ugly she makes blind children cry

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

what do u call a girl with cancer? bald.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks, and goes home an hour or so later.

what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

Why are black people faster than white people? They are descended from a lineage where athleticism was more greatly selected for in the evolutionary process.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nevermind.

What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

Why did the shark put on a dress? She was getting ready for prom.

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

How do you put 100 babys in a bucket? A blender

why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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