Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

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what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

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Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

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How do you spell Mississippi with out an i? You can't because removing an i from the word Mississippi would cause it to be spelled incorrectly.

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sdrawkcab ekoj siht tleps I whether you like it or not

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How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I would think one would be sufficient, though political affiliation shouldn't have anything to do with the situation. Unless the lightbulb was residing in a specified meeting place for members of the Republican party. Also, if the building was a more public institution for gatherings, which could imply larger ceilings, then two might be needed, just for safety precautions.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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A seven year-old boy was jumping on a trampoline. He landed awkwardly and broke his ankle. This then became infected and caused him to be permenantly paralysed.

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Why did the man fall over? he had a stroke.

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Penis-Pump

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An owl turns to the other owl. He has to, he can't move his eyes.

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Wikipedia has no entry on "gullibility."

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What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

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How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

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ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

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yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned about her health

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I eat you and die of obesity due to high blood pressure and bad heart disease!!!

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Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

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Why did John fall off the tree? We were throwing rocks at him.

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Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

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What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

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What did Justin Bieber say when he felt funny? Wheres my tampon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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