Chuck Norris will die sometime in the future.

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i'm on the sea food diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Hi Shelby!!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nancy Nancy who? Nancy.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff. whats blue and fluffy? pink fluff holding its breath.

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Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

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A black man walks into a bar. The man behind him ducks.

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What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

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the jokes are repetitive on this site

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whats dirtier than lady gaga's penis in justin bieber's vagina? nothing.

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why was the Jewish child sad? He was recently abandoned by all his family.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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An Irish man willingly walks out of a bar

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Period Blood

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

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heres a great game to play... DEATH TO BABIES!

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

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What did the hooker get for christmas? Herpes

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

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Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

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Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

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Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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Whats worse than 3 black guys. 4 black guys.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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