whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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i love huge wieners.

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ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

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why do they call it history? Women didn't do shit

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Why cant Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish.

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What was Jonas's big success? Being Steven Spielbergs lead actor in his famous 1982 film.

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this anti joke will likely be the most liked one out of all the anti jokes.

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A girl asks a guy "How come you don't take me dancing anymore?" The guy said "Because we were both killed in a car accident."

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why didnt you take a shower? because my house burnt down

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knock knock

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Whats horny and big A dick minus the big part!

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Why was the dog barking? No idea.

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

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A Jew sits down next to a muslim at the bar. They great and discuss their day's events, they both order beers. Then they go home.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gregory Pelnick

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a chinese man and an irishman walk into a bar. This is odd because these men are from countries extremely far apart from one another

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown, how mad would you be if i ate your golfish? Very angry, as my goldfish is not food.

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A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

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what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

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You are short with no perm, you will never be Kat Willams.

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What's the difference between a computer and a television?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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