Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

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Why was the black man hanged? He was charged with piracy in the 1500s..

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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where did Bob go during the bombing attacks? All over the walls.

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When the clock strikes the bell at elephantasourous during my erectionn i screw myself CC

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How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

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Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

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Whats worse than the holocaust??having a downstndrome for a child

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Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

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There is a knock on the door. Little Jimmy comes dowstairs opens the door and standing in the door way is the axe wielding manic fromTexas Chainsaw.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

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What's worse than finding twelve dead babies nailed to a tree? One living baby nailed to twelve trees.

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What do you call a orange striped zebra? No not a tiger stupid its a orange striped zebra duh!

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None, cus feminists can't change shit.

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Three blokes walk into a bar. I'm british.

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What did the doctor say to the Jew? You have cancer.

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I ate a pancake for breakfast not

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A:Will you be my valentine? B:No

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How do you get an elephant in pajamas? Elephants are large mammals with several layers of body fat, and pajamas are for humans. there is no purpose in attempting this feat at all.

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A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

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What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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