What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

Not an anti-joke, but an anti-pick-up-line: How much does a polar bear weight? Not as much as you!

want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

you know what hurts.... PAIN

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

What did the finger say to the thumb? Nothing, fingers can't talk.

What happened to the alligator who waled into a bar? He was killed and skinned by swamp hunters in Louisiana.

Why did the cookie go to the docter? Because he was dieing of terminal cancer.

Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or words that begin with "F" and end in "uck." So you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

Why do reindeer pull Santa's Sleigh? Because Santa won't feed them if they don't.

What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

how do you make money? you roba bank! :)

sdrawkcab ekoj siht tleps I whether you like it or not

Who broke into the village's homes and smashed all of the vases? Link did.

why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

What's better than winning gold at the special Olympics? Not being retarded. - Blake Woodman

Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...