Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

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A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

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You are driving a bus. At the first stop, 12 people get on and 7 get off At the second stop, 13 people get on and 11 get off At the third stop, 7 people get off the bus. You turn the bus off get out and go home.

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What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

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Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

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What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

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why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

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What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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why is black such a deprssing color because it symbolizes death

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Why do white people despise black people? Because they are good at everything we suck at.

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

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what's the difference between a car and a pile of dead babies? nothing, they're both overused anti jokes.

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A Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. What hit the wall first? Probably his penis.

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A Christian, a Jew and a Muslim fly in an airplane. They all reach safely to their destination and have a lovely vacation.

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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imagine a world without santa ill make it easy, lookout the window

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Hi Shelby!!

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Why don't they sell aspirin in the jungle? Because it is not financially viable to sell pharmaceuticals in a largely unpopulated area.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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