Kumquats, daffodils, and potato salad.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

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heres a great game to play... DEATH TO BABIES!

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a fox stapled to his face.

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That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

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Q:Why couldn't the baby walk down the hall way? A: It had a javelin stuck in its head.

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What does an Asian man, Black man, & a Hick all have in common with automatic weapons? The Asian is Vietnamese and fought in the Nam, The Black guy lives in the ghetto and was shot in a drive by, and the hick and his best friend got drunk and shot each other in the foot.

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Chuck norris eats nails for breakfast. This is most likely the cause of his bleeding stomach and acid reflux.

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

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What rhymes with turtle? Rape

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What do you call an amazing, funny, beautiful, nice, goreous, stunning girl? Adena Gabrysiak <3

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Why was the puppy sad? It was burning alive

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Why did the dog's chin get all scraped up? He didn't have any front legs.

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Whats worse than 3 black guys. 4 black guys.

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im a selling a car

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poo poo you you doo doo too too

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So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

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Women's rights...

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What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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Vagina-Boob

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Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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