What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

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Women's football

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No

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What did the Polar Bear say when he slid off the iceberg? Radio

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What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

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What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

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Shortest Joke in the World? Well, just look down.

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A man walks into a bar. I don't know what happened next because I was waiting outside for my friend.

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How many times have I told you not to do that? Fourteen.

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Christopher Walken to a bar.

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How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Why do reindeer pull Santa's Sleigh? Because Santa won't feed them if they don't.

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Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

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Larry stopped by today to drop of a package. The package was a bomb. So I gave the "gift" to my neighbor for her birthday. My Mom is my neighbor.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a woman. Why couldn't hellen Keller have fun at the zoo? She was blind and deaf.

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What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

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What did the boy do when he got locked out his house go on anti joke and make a stupid joke about him being locked out

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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