A jew go out of a bar

Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't, because feminists can never change anything!

What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

stop it ryan vallee

What is the diffrence between a guy and pie? The pie taste like fruit somethimes

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

an amosh person used an electrical appliance

whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

hey

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no legs. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because its not suppost to be in the tree. Why did susy fall off her bike? Because she was hit by 2 monkeys and a refrigerator!

"Doctor," I said while poking my head, "My head hurts!" I poked my knee. "My knee hurts, too!" Then I tried touching my arm. "OW! So does my arm!" I even tried poking my teeth. "OUCH! Even my teeth hurt! What will I do Doctor?" "That's easy," said the Doctor, "I'll fix your finger right away."

Jacob Black and Edward Cullen show up at your house. You tell your best girl friend and she has you admitted to a psych ward because everyone knows they are fictional characters!

Why wasn't the child swimming? It drowned

What do you call a helicopter above Hawaii? A helicopter.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nancy Nancy who? Nancy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

If god gives you lemons You find a new god.

Why did the man go to the barber? To get a haircut

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas ? Cancer

What did the man from Hiroshima see when he looked up at the sky on August 6th, 1945? Some birds.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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