What is green and red and spins around? A frog in a blender

why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

What do you call a group of Mexicans crossing the U.S. border? A travel soccer team.

A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

Why was Timmy sad?

And now, A cow pretending to be a man: Jeff: Alan, are you a cow? Alan: What?! No! Cow: Yah me neither you guys want to go skatebords? *Awkward*

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

Why did Susie fall off her swing? She had no arms Nock nock Who's there? Not Susie.

That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

your joke is so unoriginal. i had heard the joke before.

Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

Miranda Lorenz is a WHORE!!! She has slept with three guys while in a relationship!! then when he broke up with her for cheating on him, she keyed his car!! Psycho Bitch!!!

whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

What did the orphan boy get for his birthday? The extermination of his race.

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her statement.

Chuck Norris Isn't That tuff if he was he would come to my house and slam my head in they keyboaredehfiu;qbg;qebnuighqije9qp8ubwrsijpa

I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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