Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

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what did the boy from a computer recycling unit in china get on his birthday? Pancreatic cancer.

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What did the muffin say to the oven? Obviously nothing since neither one can talk.

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What is the diffrence between a guy and pie? The pie taste like fruit somethimes

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What do you call a thirsty girl? H2Hoe

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I have no ideas.

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A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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what did the ruler say to the other ruler your a ruler

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't, because feminists can never change anything!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nancy Nancy who? Nancy.

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Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

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what did one mexican say to the other Hi.

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Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

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How is it called a black man piloting a plane? Pilot, you racist!

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An Irish man willingly walks out of a bar

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What do you get when an Asian and a black person have a baby? Black and yellow. Black and yellow. Black and yellow. :)

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing...he found it.

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Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

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How did the bald lady die? Of cancer

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How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

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What do you call a pregnant 8-year old? A poor reflection on our society

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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