Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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What is the difference between a black guy and shit? One just looks and smells like shit, and the other actually is shit.

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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Your mother is a man.

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Norm Macdonald's roast of Bob Saget.

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What do you call a gay man flying an aeroplane? A pilot.

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Early yesterday around 10:23am a local women by the name of Bethany Francis Polluch died from a injury to the head. At the scene investigators discovered a tree fell on her causing the trauma. Believe it or not the tree was in the kitchen.

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you wanna know hellen kellers favorite game? Marco Polo!

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lick my ballsack.... ok

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What is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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What do you call a bunch of Mexicans on fire? Jumping Beans.

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

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Yo mama is so fat, she is thinking of going on a diet.

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A muslim walked into a bar. Then he walked out because he had made a wrong turn.

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What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

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what do you call a bear on a unicycle? improbable.

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Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

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This is "Eliza" holy shit! I almost gave up and went to a party assuming you guys had simply skipped the reply. Please tell me nothing of this is written in code, because I have no fucking idea how to decipher it... ...To think that so few consider Nero a hero for all that he has done, and so many have come to hate him and still follow his advice basically abusing him. I told my sister to use mom`s cellphone to call and warn as many as possible, telling them to spread the word, is Nero7 Going to make it? He mentioned a barfight starting over nothing during new years eve. I know that some of the members where planning to use his own teachings in order to overthrow him, I warned him but he was fully aware already but did nothing for some reason. Yet none of them have the assets to do anything like this... Should I start calling all those members that left during Nero7`s "sudden paranoia period?" Many of them have political authority and can be of help if we can somehow convince them. Respond Asap, and if Nero7 is in a public hospital, then get him the hell out of there, he is an exposed target for anyone, if he gets killed, ill fucking kill you you hear me!

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Your mom’s so dumb she forgot to update her WordPress installation and now she has pharmaceutical links all over her page.

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What did the little girl do with her puppy? She killed it.

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How many pieces of bling does it take to ruin a rap song? Just Two Chainz

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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