What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

A man goes to a doctor to check about an itch on his testicles. Turns out it was just a rash and is promptly prescribed medication and it clears up in a week.

your joke is so unoriginal. i had heard the joke before.

Why was the blonde crying? Because she just watched her infant get sucked into a jet engine and she was very sad.

If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

When I see Debra walking her dog in the morning I often ask myself whose walking who!?

What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

Chuck Norris died.

How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

I was purple once. I took a shower later that day.

Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia They had communism

So there's A blonde, a brunette and a redhead at a lake. they all swim across and have a picnic at the other end.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

oh hiya come in

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Todays word of the day, is "legs" lets head back to your place and spread the word....

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

I'm so hungry I feel I would be able to ingest large quantities of food.

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

I have no ideas.

Why did the pig have a band-aid? Because he had a whole in his foot.

Okay on a scale Casey Anthony to Jerry Pandusky how much do you love your kids?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...