What is green and red and spins around? A frog in a blender

Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

Roses are red, Violets are pencil, this poem makes no sense, refrigerator

What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

Roses are red. I had no clue. I like pie. So screw you.

How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

What happened to the blonde who walked up to the vending machine? She got a snack and went on with her day.

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Its socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

Why do they censor everything on here? Because **** **** ******* *** ***** *****.

Bin Laden comes out of a cave

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What's brown and sticky? Poo

Blonde Entrepeneurs

Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

knock knock use the doorbell. our door has a hive of bees in it. three ambulances and a pest control squad was at the house five minutes later.

What's funnier than Carrot Top and Dane Cook combined? Almost anything.

Whats9+10 19

How did Helen Kellers parents punish her? They moved the furniture.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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