What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

what do you get if you cross a cat with a cat? kittens.

roses are red, violets are red, my garden is on fire

Why did Timmy stop running? He got hit by a bus

What rhymes with turtle? Rape

So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

A Banana wrote this...

why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

People tell me im insane. Its all a conspiracy.

alert("The Game");//

A seal walks into a club.

Martin Luther King Jr. had a dream..... But Leonardo DiCaprio had a dream within a dream within a dream within a dream.

If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

Want to hear a tough toung twister? spoons

Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

-When is a door not a door? -Never

When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

What is next?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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