What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

2 snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.... ba dooom chesh

don't look behind you

your mom is so stupid, she once wrote a math test and didn't do very well.

Why do the piglets have their heads down low? Because they are ashamed that their mom is fat.

A blind man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and after a couple hours he leaves. He's only color blind.

What's the best thing to say to a deaf person? Nothing. They are hearing impaired and won't hear you.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

What's the difference between a rooster and a waffle iron? A lot.

why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

"Media Zombies" Sounds like the Nero I remember.

hey.

a chinese man and an irishman walk into a bar. This is odd because these men are from countries extremely far apart from one another

Why do white people wear black shirts? Why do black people wear white shirts?

So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are walking down the street when they find a genie. They run away in fear because finding a genie out of nowhere is kinda freaky.

What's bigger than the Loch Ness Monster? Loch Ness.

How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her what her name is

why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...