why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

A Banana wrote this...

Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

Why did the computer crash? Because the driver transporting the computer to his friend lost control of his vehicle.

Hey, name is Anita, I am Nero`s nurse, he told me to say that if you wish to speak any further, you are going to have to call him and prove you are not some guy. Say Tifa, do you ever play videogames?

Get your coat, I've got a knife.

I saw a chameleon. Then it died

Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

Knock knock Who's there? I don't know go check.

Whats worse than scraping your elbow and knee? Beheading and disembowlment.

What is the best school in Victoria? Lyndale.

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

how do you kill a mexican? make him go to the cicus

Why was the jewish girl happy? Her pussy was wet!

What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

Knock knock What

What's the difference between a BMW and pile of dead babies? I don't have a BMW in my garage.

What is next?

Osama Bin Laden and a monk walk into a bar. Mistaken Identity. It was the Dalai Lama, Osama is dead.

The Bible

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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