What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

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A man walks into a bar. I don't know what happened next because I was waiting outside for my friend.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Why do reindeer pull Santa's Sleigh? Because Santa won't feed them if they don't.

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a man walks into a gay bar. he was gay.

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuse 7 was a convicted serial killer. >----->

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

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What is Bigfoots favorite food? Biscuits and Gravy.

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A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

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What did the boy do when he got locked out his house go on anti joke and make a stupid joke about him being locked out

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If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

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There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

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What did one baby say to the other? Nothing, they were both killed in a building collapse.

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What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not sally

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Gadaffi

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cactus and you are a Jew EJ

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You are driving a bus. At the first stop, 12 people get on and 7 get off At the second stop, 13 people get on and 11 get off At the third stop, 7 people get off the bus. You turn the bus off get out and go home.

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You know what's never heard of? Father's Day in Camden.

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What did the town guard say to the adventurer? "I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I got a full-time job so that I could support my family and spend more time with my children."

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Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops