How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What do you call a Mexican who gets his car stolen. A: Pablo

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the chicken cross the street? it didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Gabe Mercado

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do magnets work?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

slow down! you move too fast. you gotta make the morning last. just tripping down the cobblestones. looking for fun and feeling grovvy.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the boy die at his Halloween party? He was the victim of a drive-by.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A Blonde, a Brunette, and a Red head were on a plane. They never met, and went their separate ways.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tied to the first monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the man say to the homeless child. Where's you parents?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do JFK and Hitler have in common? They died.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what's faster than a snail? Usain Bolt

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's White and can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

shirt and blue, i call this one snow white, to score and seven years a jo, six samurai kageki, coral, 50 piece, specific frame, whats with that one, amy, hoption, smell my butt, smell my balls, smell my fart, smell my poop, urgay, one swipe, maestrostalfos, imdesiringyourhair, i call this one the cinderella story if you HAAAAAAAAAA know what i mean, paul are you ok?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Two Jews are on their way to the giant oven, one looks back at the other in fear and says, "I think I overcooked the lasagna."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

my computer crashed because i never quit... out of anything

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why is One direction the best thing in the world? Becuz when 5 hot guys met each other they... Sorry I got lost in Zayn's eyes again! Now what were we talking about??????

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

2 Jews walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks and call a cab to get home

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are grey, violets are grey, the sky is grey so is the grass everything is grey, as i am colourblind

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops