Why is amouse afraid of cheese? Because they usually die when they get it

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the man fall over? he had a stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why wasnt the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you call someone with no legs? whatever their name is, physical appearance should have no bearing on someones title.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why do Jews make sure their cars can stop on a dime? So if something happens unexpectedly when they are driving they have a better chance of avoiding a dangerous collision.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

There are two fish in a bathtub. One turns to the other and says "Could you please pass the soap?" The other one says "What do I look like to you, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the pig have a band-aid? Because he had a whole in his foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's brown and sticky? Poo

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Bin Laden comes out of a cave

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Samantha ate 62 cookies. Then she ate 300 more. How many did she eat after that? None she didn't for the next 6 years after developing an eating disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why cant Jesus play rugby? Cause he's nailed to a cross

thumb_up thumb_down +23

-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Unflushed Shit...

thumb_up thumb_down +23

h

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

thumb_up thumb_down +23

don't look behind you

thumb_up thumb_down +21

If god gives you lemons You find a new god.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you get if you cross a black man with a sword? A dead black man

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops