What do you call a dead black guy? A TERRIBLE CRIME

Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

What does an Asian man, Black man, & a Hick all have in common with automatic weapons? The Asian is Vietnamese and fought in the Nam, The Black guy lives in the ghetto and was shot in a drive by, and the hick and his best friend got drunk and shot each other in the foot.

Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

knock, knock Sho'sthere? Sam who? Sam Butt

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

-When is a door not a door? -Never

Osama Bin Laden and a monk walk into a bar. Mistaken Identity. It was the Dalai Lama, Osama is dead.

What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

Knock knock What

What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? While Beethoven enjoyed many different varieties of fruit, he found strawberries the most appealing.

What's the difference between a BMW and pile of dead babies? I don't have a BMW in my garage.

whats wrong with 4 blackmen in a jaguar falling over a cliff?? That was my car...

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

Three blokes walk into a bar. I'm british.

There was a white man who sat on a log. then suddenly a Chinese man popped out and said he had to leave. he left.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan? Their last names.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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