Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

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Obama

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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What happened to the blonde who walked up to the vending machine? She got a snack and went on with her day.

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Why do the piglets have their heads down low? Because they are ashamed that their mom is fat.

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A Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. What hit the wall first? Probably his penis.

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

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There once were two muffins in an oven, and one definitely did not start talking to the other

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I cat tried to jump over a fence It was electrified

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Albert and Hunter, Forever in love < 3

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shih-tzu? Dogs are large and solid objects and therefore cannot be mixed together.

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Okay on a scale Casey Anthony to Jerry Pandusky how much do you love your kids?

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A blind man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and after a couple hours he leaves. He's only color blind.

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an amosh person used an electrical appliance

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What was the dying Raccoons last words? I don't want to die.

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What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

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Did you see Ray Charles's house? No. Yeah, neither did he.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who? Knock knock? Who's there? Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's who?

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies In a tub 10 and 1/2

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What's worse than finding mold on your cheese? Getting Raped

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What are the black specks in birdshit called? That's birdshit too.

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Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

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So a disabled man walks into a bar...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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