A man walks into a bar. He says ow

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Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

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Women

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What's worse than locking your keys in ur at outside of an abortion clinic? Going in side and asking for a coat hanger!!

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WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

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What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

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How do you kill somebody instantly? Make them smell Smelly mcD's socks.

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How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Little Timmy died yesterday

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Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

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How did the fat man die? Type 2 diabetes

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what did the scientist say in Siberia? burrrrrrrrrrilium

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Canida

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Why couldn't sally drive her car? Because sally is a girl.

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I can't stand 9/11 jokes Their just plane wrong!

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What's easier to get than a broke hooker on the side of the street? Osama Bin Laden.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well neither has he.

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I'll give you a nickel to lick my pickle, a dime to take your time and a quarter if I can f*ck you in the ass

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what do you call a gay bird a gaybird

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Rock mattress.

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What's a boomerang that never comes back to you? A stick. :/

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Why did the Vietnemese prostitute ask for the phone? Because she wanted to use the phone.

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You remind me of something. What? Summer Why because I'm hot? no because there is no class..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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