A man was walking on the sidewalk until he saw a bird. He said, "Is that a bird?", and it was a bird.

If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new home? No. Neither has he....

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

A man walks into a doctor's office, he pees in a cup and is diagnosed with diabetes.

If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

Knock knock! Who's there? The police. There was a severe accident not long ago. Your family are dead.

There was once a simple man. His life was far from what could be described as extravagant, living alone in a dingy apartment full of leaking taps and insects and lacking a working refrigerator. He wasn't an ungrateful man but he often wondered why life was cruel to him and prayed every night for something magical to happen, whether it be a brand new life, or even something simple like a new fridge. One fateful late afternoon as he staggered along the dim backstreet, partially crippled and pained from his standard day of labour, he came across a brass lamp just laying in the street. Glancing around, the man bent down to pick it up, knowing very well the story of the genie in the lamp having just watched Aladdin the previous night. Peering into its dull surface, he saw eyes staring back at him, eyes he didn't recognise. Anxiously, he ran his hands over the surface of the lamp, feeling the coolness of the metal on his rough blistered hands. But nothing happened! Disappointed but desperate for his dreams to be fulfilled, the man frantically shook the lamp, tears streaming down his face, wonder how life could be so cruel. Then a fridge fell out of the lamp and crushed him and he died the end.

Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, they're just out of bad taste.

Your mom is so black that her skin tone is darker than most people

why was the black man in jail? He stole food from a store due to the fact that his family was very poor and could not afford to fend for themselves.

Steven hawking drives into a bar Disability

WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

Whats fat, brown and on the ground? A chubby indian kid

What did the cow say to his friend? Moo.

Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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