math test 2=2

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting fisted by hulk

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

do you like fishsticks? yes they are quite delicious

thumb_up thumb_down +44

I told a woman to make me a turkey sandwich. Of course she complied since I was at Subway.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What happened to the alligator who waled into a bar? He was killed and skinned by swamp hunters in Louisiana.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Popsicle!

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

sdrawkcab ekoj siht tleps I whether you like it or not

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or words that begin with "F" and end in "uck." So you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A black man, an Asian man, and a white man are stranded in the wilderness after their plane crashed. The black man has a flashlight, the Asian a bottle of water, and the white man a can of beans. They put their racial differences aside to increase chance of survival but were eaten by a pack of coyotes.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Japan called... They need help.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call someone with no legs? whatever their name is, physical appearance should have no bearing on someones title.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops