What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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Why was the blonde crying? Because she just watched her infant get sucked into a jet engine and she was very sad.

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Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

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There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

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Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

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oh hiya come in

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How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

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What do Asians eat for dinner? Home cooked meals

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Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

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What did Batman say to Robin before the got into the Batmobile? - Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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What do you call a thirsty girl? H2Hoe

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How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

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what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

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A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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What do you call a Mexican with a Green Card? A hard working American Citizen

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A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. He says, "I am what I am." The white guy says, "yes." The black guy says, "why did you say yes?" If he was black he would have said, "I is what I is.":):):):):):):):)<3

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whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

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- Why a black man can not jump? - Because he broken his leg.

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a catholic priest and a young boy

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no legs. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because its not suppost to be in the tree. Why did susy fall off her bike? Because she was hit by 2 monkeys and a refrigerator!

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like for a handjob.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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Whats worse than a paper cut? AIDS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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